|Eight|

•Week Five• (7)

(Tw: gore, Adam, idk)

I rubbed my eyes, waking up for the second time on the couch. I sat up, immediately noticing that Jack and Ryan were gone.

I slipped out of the blanket, carefully getting up. My head throbbed and I half-heartedly put my hand to my forehead, trying to still the growing pain.

I made my way to the kitchen, only half-awake. The counter, stove, and table were all empty.
Confused, I went and knocked on Jack's door.

There was a brief pause before I heard Jack's muffled voice. He sounded tired, and a second later, the door opened.

He greeted me with a sleepy smile, making me smile back.

"What's wrong?"

I stopped. What was wrong? Nothing. I couldn't think of anything that was going wrong at the moment, so why was I still on edge? Why couldn't I feel at peace? Jack was probably wondering why I knocked on his door, and I was wondering the same thing.
I was scared that they were gone again, and I had to make sure they were still safe. I had gotten so used to making sure they were always safe that now, since we were out of danger, I didn't know what to do with myself.

How could things go back to normal if I was still so worried about Jack and Ryan? My heart would always sink whenever they were out of my line of sight, and I couldn't help but think something had happened. I can't live like this, I couldn't live constantly scared that something was going to go wrong. But I couldn't help it. I was traumatized, always thinking they'll be taken away from me by the killer. How was I ever going to escape the claws of grief that had wrapped around my heart? The fear of losing them had made me completely insane, even to the point where I had even justified the murders I've committed.

....... But it wasn't wrong to kill those two, was it? No, I've already been over this.

My mind was wandering, and Jack immediately snapped me back to reality by putting a hand on my shoulder.

I shivered unexpectedly, my gaze darting back to him.
"N-nothing," I finally said. Nothing was wrong, but I felt like something was wrong. What if Jasper came back? What if Ryan disappears again? What if Jack almost dies again? What if I give into my temptation to murder? What if we really can't ever be happy together again? What if I'm just selfish and I shouldn't actually stay with Jack and Ryan? No, they want me to stay.....

I took a deep breath, struggling to hide my feelings from Jack.
He gave me a sympathetic look, pulling away. "Everything's okay, Adam. Things can go back to normal."

I nodded. "I know..... I'm just gonna go sit on the couch and try to clear my mind."

He waved goodbye as I walked back down the hall, and I winced as I heard The Click of his door closing.

Things can go back to normal?

No, they can't.

But why not?

Because they can't. It's too late.

I can be happy again, it's never too late to change.

But you still crave the blood of...... Your victims.

Referring to people as my "victims" made a chill of excitement run down my spine, but I quickly shook my head.

I'm not a murderer.

You are, you can't deny it. It's who you are and you have to accept the fact that you can't be around Jack and Ryan anymore. You're a monster.