NAM DEORUM

Chapter 10:don't leave me

Above picture is how i imagine Haris and Alina.

Author's note: sorry for the late updates guys but my life is pretty fucked up plus i have zero motivation sometimes seeing no views but i hope those who read my book enjoy this chapter.

"Why do your eyes change color?" Samya asked backing away from him scared that this question might offend him. Abraxas knew it was time that he revealed his true identity. It was time that he gave Samya the choice of being with him or leaving him and it scared him to death. Oh how could he live without his other half, without his soul. Without his entire being. His mind body heart soul everything belonged to her now. What if she decides to leave, but he knew that its not his choice to make after all she should have a say in whether or not she wants to be dragged into a darker world. A world so dangerous and scary. She should be well aware of what she would get herself into if she decides to stay and if she decides to leave Abraxas sweared he would never bother her again. "I am a werewolf" he said instantly his face extremely serious. Samya in return laughed out loud like a crazy woman. "Oh come on don't kid with me right now. Are we in sone twilight kind of shit or what" she said trying to hold in the fits of her laughter. When Abraxas didn't reply she looked over at his face and saw no sign of smile or humor. He seemed unfazed not a single frown line on his face. Her laughter immediately died down. "What?? Are you serious?no you can't be that's- that's impossible" she said backing away in fear. "I am not lying to you Samya I would never. See how my eyes change their color". He said standing up getting closer to her when and his eyes changing colors again which made her back away. "Don't" she said raising her right hand in front of her, "prove it" "prove it if you aren't lying, I don't know what to say this isn't normal oh my God what did I get myself into" she said backing away further when Abraxas advanced tears filling up her eyes. Abraxas raised his hands to hug her and this made her flinch away. A tuck came towards Abraxas' heart at this action. "Love please don't be scared of me my life, please just let me explain it to you let me show it to you but please love don't break my heart like this I can't see you scared of me" he said hugging her. Samya protested in his arm hitting his chest with all her force and trying to push him away. "No let me go, why didn't you tell me before please don't hurt me" she screamed in his chest. "Hey hey hey hey shhh shhshh calm down please please please calm down" Abraxas said his voice cracking, the plea audible in his voice. His heart was breaking into a million pieces. Although Samya was scared shitless at this point Abraxas' words, his embrace somehow calmed her down. She felt at peace. It felt weird to her. The serenity she felt around Abraxas in his embrace was otherworldly. She couldn't get enough of it. Abraxas had been nothing but sweet to me, it would be so unfair of me to not give him a chance to explain himself. She thought. No man had ever treated her like Abraxas had. Every man made her feel unsafe insecure like an object, their stares made her feel like a mannequin on display in shop where everyone would drool over it and how it made things look beautiful due to its shape. She closed her eyes smiling. She knew this was her peace her solace. Abraxas was her comfort, in that moment she knew and realized that she would regret her entire life if she doesn't give Abraxas a chance. "Let's do one thing I'll make you meet my wolf, only if you want to ofcourse and you will see how much he cares for you. Trust me you would feel so comfortable around him and your fear would subside in no time" Abraxas said looking at her right in her eyes expecting her to give him a chance expecting her to stay and not run away. "After meeting him you can decide whether you want to stay or"- he took in a deep shaky breathe "or leave" his eyes and entire demeanor hardened at that word. It was like a dagger piercing his heart out. That mere word made him anger to his core. The thought of losing her after he finally found her after so many years ached his heart to the point it physically hurt. Samya was shocked to see Abraxas this way. So vulnerable in front of her so considerate of her. He sat her down on the sofa saying "let's do it this way, you meet my wolf and decide what you want for yourself. And I swear my life nam deorum if you want me to leave I'll walk out of your life and never turn back or bother you. Yes I'll still look at you from afar to see you because it's physically impossible for me to not become a monster again after losing you, I'll look at you fall in love with another"- he closed his eyes taking a deep breathe the words he was about to utter would perforate his heart his entire soul. "I would watch you happy with another man I would watch your children. I'll keep you protected for the rest of your life and then your children and then theirs for the rest of their lives. And if you decide to not leave if you decide to let me stay, I am going to make you the happiest human alive on earth. I'll show you what love is, you are my queen you will be my queen. I'll worship you daily from your body to your soul. You will be my goddess, hell you are my goddess. You are my revelation, my prayer. The day I would die I'll take your name and not the moon goddesses' for these entire cosmos know that only you have the power to make this great lord kneel in front of you" and that's how he knelt in front of her bowing his head submitting to his queen. She made the great lonely God kneel in front of her this is something only she could do. He never even bowed in front of anyone even when the moon goddess herself came on this earth to announce him as the Lord of werewolves, even then he didn't kneel in front of her. He didn't beg her or ask for forgiveness, hell he didn't even bow his head. He has always had his head held high but his queen his Goddess the one he worships made him do that "You are my divinity my life. Before finding you I was living, surviving but now that I have finally found you I can't stay away from you, my heart wouldn't bear it, without you my life could only be this much trust me Samya I can't live without you" he said letting wanting to cry but holding it all in. Samya on the other hand was speechless her eyes were filled with tears but not sad, instead they were happy tears. When did this stranger grow such fondness towards her she thought. She looked at him with adoration in her eyes. Abraxas kneeling in front of her tucked on her heart, she grabbed him by his arms lightly. "I want to see your wolf" she said smiling at him. She didn't know what else to say, still recovering from the way Abraxas was begging for her to stay, as if the lost souls, the ones who have been tormenting since centuries, the wailing souls asked the great God Hades for forgiveness. For the end to their never ending affliction. He was begging her to stay like his life depended on it. The words alone made Abraxas' heart leap in happiness. "Really" he said looking up so innocently. "Yes I would love to"
~~~
"Woww you are"— they were now in Abraxas' backyard in front of the pool where Abraxas had shifted. He barely shifted in his true wolf form. He would always held shift, walk and talk like a human being in wolf form but now he gave complete absolute control to Adonis. Samya was taciturn. The sight in front of her was magical, mystical, angelic. She had no words to describe the beautiful obsidian black wolf standing in front of her. His wolf was huge. No werewolf had ever seen him like this in his complete wolf form not even the pack he was the alpha of. Only the indigenous had seen him and they were all dead by now. Samya went closer to it touching his head and sitting down. She started petting Adonis softly letting the silk fur tickle her hands. She scratched him behind his head and he howled in approval. She pecked him and pet him on his head enjoying the feeling of his fur. "You are so soft and huge" she said and giggled as Adonis licked her face and nibbled it. Adonis felt so at peace, finally all his restlessness gone. It was impossible for him as a Lycan to hold in not meeting his mate. It was remarkable how much he waited just so that his mate wouldn't be uncomfortable. So that she wouldn't leave him. It was difficult for Abraxas to be mateless for so many years but no one could imagine the pain his wolf felt. How he spent every moment in pity and being pathetic over the fact that in his anger he had lost the chance of having a mate. How much he blamed himself for his and Abraxas' pain. He whined at that thought and hid his face in Samya's chest nuzzling it. Samya realized something was wrong, "what happened to my Good boy" she said petting him again. Stroking Adonis behind the ears she moved to his back and scratched him with her fingers. Adonis further howled in approval and relaxed under her touch. He started jumping in excitement. "You are so cute" this remark made him growl and Samya was shocked how she wasn't scared instead she laughed even more at this. "Awww someone doesn't like being called cute huh" she said. "My cute little bubba" she laughed again scratching Adonis which made him growl even more loudly. He started tickling her with his nose. Samya landed on her back with Adonis now on top of her. He licked her face, panting and tickling her. It wasn't only when Samya was in pain due to laughing so much that she stopped him "okay okay that's enough" she said trying to sound serious "my cute bubs" she said again and broke into laughter. She couldn't control it no matter how much he tried. If a werewolf or even a human would have seen her behaving like this around the Lord they would say she was asking for her head to be separated from her body. But Abraxas neither Adonis mind it. They loved it. The growling was just a play. He swore in that moment that he could be whatever his mate wanted him to be. "Cutie pie what's wrong" Samya said laughing breaking hum fr his trance. Suddenly the weight was lifted off from Samya and the wolf was no more there instead laid there on top of her this handsome male who made her feel like she is the only creature he is left on earth. Like his life depended on her for survival, for every breathe that he took was for her. Abraxas kissed Samya on her forehead then on her eyes and cheeks and proceeded to dip his head towards her neck. He kissed her lightly over there before sucking onto the skin igniting a fire in Samya which she never thought she was capable of feeling. He bit hard on her skin which made her arch her back and moan in pleasure. "Not so cute now am I?" He said looking straight into Samya's eyes. He continue kissing and licking her which made Samya wrap her arms around him. She tucked on his hair which made him growl in happiness that his ministrations were having a positive outcome. He left several love marks around the previous hickeys. "I love my marks on you. You are mine and only mine Samya. No matter what happens if you stay I am never letting you get out of my sight" he said and before she could answer him he kissed her deeply. This kiss was meaningful so slow and passionate yet filled with love. Samya kissed him back with equal passion wanting to tell him that she's never leaving him. He was her peace her happiness how could she herself run away from it. She didn't know why she was feeling like this yet but she was all too sure of how much her heart craved for Abraxas and how much she wanted to be with him. Today tomorrow and for the rest of her life. Breaking the kiss Abraxas rested his forehead against Samya's "I am never leaving you. I am yours today tomorrow, forever and always" Samya said. Abraxas got off her and picked her up in his arms lifting her in air and spinning with her in happiness. She laughed at this action and spread her arms in the air enjoying being like this. She felt like she was flying. She felt free. For the first time she found her freedom. For the first time she was happy to create new memories and forget the older ones. Bringing her down slowly Abraxas kissed her again. "You have no idea how this makes me feel so you?" He said "you have no idea that you made me the most mirthful and jolly creature in earth". "Thank you nam DEORUM thank you my life my love my Samya" he said kissing her everywhere making her giggle. In a moment the smile from her face was gone as she was reminded of two specific people who would be worried sick by now. She realized she never informed them about being at Abraxas' house. "What's wrong my life? "I- I forgot to inform Haris and Alina they both must have flipped the entire NYC at this point" she said breaking away from his arms. Abraxas chuckled in return which made Samya frown. "Aww my love don't make that face I already got them informed don't worry" "you did? Wh-when how? Samya was flabbergasted. "I have my ways nam DEORUM"