The foster girl

I open up

Sensitives topics up ahead -

Gia - when I was a toddler I actually lived here I moved to London when I was 4. I lived in freedridge with my mom and dad, but my dad was shot when I was 3 . I don't remember him , so when my caseworker said people want to foster me here , I thought it would help me find out about my pops . Stupid thought to be honest , I don't have a picture a name or nothing so why did I think coming here was a good choice .
Oscar lifts my chin up and pecks me , I let him do it . I like this boy but how long until it all changes .
Oscar - do you regret coming here
Gia - no I don't
He smiles then the smile drops and the face turns to pity. Pity doesn't look good on him
Oscar - I am sorry about your dad , what happened to your ma
Gia - don't look at me like that it's not your best look .
Oscar smirks .
Oscar - what is my best look
I don't want to tell the rest of my story so I answer , if it makes his ego bigger well it's a sacrifice I want to make .
Gia- I like the smile you do , the one after we kissed I think that is your most attractive look you should do it more
Oscar - well that just means you are gonna have to kiss me more , Gia what happened to your mom.
Gia - what didn't happen . She left me when I was 6 year old in the middle of the night . I woke up and she was gone , I got myself dressed and walked to school and I did that for 2 days until the police came to my house and got me .
They put me into my first foster home and that's how I got this .
I sit up and pull him up with me . I lift down my joggers and show him the scar on my thigh and his face drops for a second than turns to pure anger .
Oscar- can I touch it
I can't breath , but maybe if I let him do it , it might help . I grab his hand and put it on my bare skin thigh. His fingers rub over the scar and I hold my breath .
Oscar - how
He removes his hands of my thigh and pulls my joggers back up . Then grabs me and pulls me closer to him .
Oscar - hey I got you , breath
and I do .
Gia - I was there for two weeks and it was okay.
The man had not had one bit of alcohol for those two weeks than one night he came back fucked .
I didn't have a place to sleep so I left on the livingroom floor . I couldn't sleep on the sofa as they said it was a new one and didn't want it ruined . The man came closer to me and I remember feeling so scared . He said " hmm maybe this might be good" and he started touching my stomach and tried to pull my trousers . I started screaming and kicking him and moving around he got angry and starting kicking me and started hitting me . No one else was there that night. He went into the kitchen and I limped to the door and screamed and kept screaming hoping the neighbours would come and save me . The man ran up to me and hit the hard of the knife against my head . I still tried to fight but what can a 6 year old do to a grown men . He tried to pull my trousers down again and I remember how ouch strength I used to kick him in well you know but I used all my strength doing that , so I couldn't run away . He stabbed me and get twisted it and got my top off . Then the door burst open and it was cop , and the officer looked at me then at the man and he started punching him . He called for backup to get the man as he has handcuffed him to the table then he picked me up and brought me to hospital . I was there for a week and officer Tyler stayed there with me for the whole week . That is my first foster home story and my first scar story .
Oscar looks at me and grabs my face .
Oscar - shit you the strongest person I know
Gia - I got stabbed again in another foster home
Oscar - what , can I see all the scars
Gia - why
Oscar - I need to see the times you needed me and I wasn't there .
I show him the stab mark on my shoulder . Than the gunshot wound on my stomach . He surprises me and it's surprises me that I let him , he kisses my scars .
Gia - what the fuck are you doing
Oscar - the story behind them might be hell ma but they be beautiful on you
I laugh
Gia - I got this one on my shoulder when I was 10 . My mom had came back from me and the first 3 months were okay , we didn't speak at all but I felt so happy that I was back with my mom especially after everything that happened to me . One day I came home from school and I went into the bathroom and my mom was laying on the floor . She had taken pills and I remember dragging her into the bathtub and when the cold water hit her she would wake up and then i would turn it off and she was dead again . She died 27 times in one hour , until the ambulance came and took her until the hospital .
Oscar - you didn't have to do that , you was just a kid
Gia - well I was a tough kid, but yes a kid should never go through that . I am going to make sure my babies don't .
Oscar - yes our babies ain't never going through that
He says while smirking , I love how he makes me forget about my shit and annoyed at him to make light of the situation .
I laugh Gia - woah homie I ain't having my kids look like you
Oscar - i am not your homie I am going to be your baby daddy .
He says while looking me up and down , how is he doing that we are sitting down weirdo .
Oscar - what happened after
Gia - she came out fine and I remember officer Tyler stayed with me at the hospital
Oscar - why you never lived with this cop
Gia - I wanted to but he had a big family of his own . A month later I walked in to the house and there were men there and drugs on the table and my mom had a cut on her cheek. Before I could run the men grabbed me and said " we are going to hurt your kid if you don't give us our money" she looked me right into my eye and said "hurt her ". They did , they really hurt me . My mom tried to run off and they picked up a knife and stabbed me just below my shoulder and I screamed . She didn't even look back . Then the main man said " let that women go , it was only 10 pounds anyway . My whole heart shattered there , my ribs already were shattered from getting kicked , my arm was shattered from being jumped on but my heart hurt the most . My mom let me get hurt so much for 10 pounds. They left and I was there and I crawled to the phone and called Tyler , he came with me to the hospital .
I recovered and he taught me to fight . Not to be cocky but I got pretty good . The story goes stupid after that I carried on getting beat by foster parents even though I knew how to defend myself , when I was 13 I went to New York. Met Rio

I felt his grip tighten on my waist when I mentioned Rios name .
Gia- He saw me fight and got me into street fighting and that helped me live .
Oscar - what about the gun shot wound mama
Gia - a gang was about to do a drive by and I saw and there was a little boy there and I ran and jumped infront of him .
Oscar - shit you are
Gia - damaged
He pulled me on him like how he did before on the beach .
Oscar - strong but I got other words for you , fine , thick , damn, spooky's ruca
I laugh .Gia - who said I was spooky's ruca homie
Oscar leans in close and I can feel his breath on my lips .
Oscar - you gonna want to stop calling me homie
Gia - or what
Oscar - you hungry
Gia - yes , what about you
Oscar looks at my lips - yep , i meant what I said , you are so strong a lot stronger than me
Gia - that's the problem with being the strong one no one offers you a hand
I get up off Oscar and stick my hands up to lift him up . He laughs and takes it, I use all my strength to drag him up . He ain't fat but damn bro he is heavy . I drag him up but I lose my balance and fall and pull him down with me , oo this is way to cliche for me . Why in movies when this happens people act like this dose not hurt because a 6ft 3 , tattooed cholo falling on me did more than tickle me .
Gia - fuck ese you fat .
Oscar - who's fat,
He takes his weight off me but still hovers over me . He uses his hands to gesture to himself .
Oscar - I don't see no fat
I put my hands on his chest getting ready to push him off me .
Then he kisses me . It's a quick kiss but his hands are on my waist and his face is close to mine , he is giving me the option to kiss him back or not . I might regret this another time , but I just told this man my story and he hasent run . He's here right now and he might not be in the future but right now he is so I kiss him back .
I have one hand on his face ,and one of the back of his head . He has one hand on my waist and one on the ground to hold himself up . He started kissing my neck but I pushed him off and he look confused but I gave him a peck and he smiled and shook his head .
Gia - no way are you claiming my neck too .
Oscar gets up and we start walking to his car and he puts his arm around my shoulder .
Oscar - what do you want to claim my neck first
I laugh .
Oscar - how bout we talk about it at dinner
Gia - talk about me sucking on your neck
Oscar smirks . Oscar - we can talk about that if you want , I meant us
Gia - us
Oscar - everyone else knows you my ruca , but you don't it yet
Gia - hmm
I think he means officially , yes we have kissed a few times and I have opened up to him and him the same . Making him my boyfriend seems hard though , I do like him but if I make him my boyfriend he could hurt me more than a lot of people have . I don't want to fall in love is what I have said to many boys and therapists . The answer is really easy , I don't want my happiness to depend on whether a person gives me their attention or not . I don't want to stay up late wondering whether he is thinking about me . I don't want to feel pain over someone who may not care . I don't want to stare at my phone screen waiting for a text . Most importantly , I don't want to give anyone the power to destroy me.
Oscar - a penny for your thoughts mama .
Then he gave me that smile . I don't want to fall in love but holy shit I think I might blow it .
We got into his car and I was expecting to fight over him putting his hand on my thigh again but he changed today . He grabbed my hand while I was driving and rubbed his thumb along it .
Gia - that's a change
Oscar - I want to hold you hand , that a problem homie
He said while smirking .
Gia - nah homie
Oscar - don't call my homie
He keeps making me laugh Gia - you just called me it
Oscar - I wanted to hear that laugh
Gia - well you heard it
Oscar - yep and I am going to keep on hearing it . We home now
Home , that word I hate . he notices my flinch .
Oscar - you good mama
Gia - I am good
That's the first lie I told him