Already Gone

I'm Still Here

"So Ms. Collins," Nick turned his head to look at me before looking back at my mother, "Would you say that you've been involved in Summer's life prior to this day."

I swear if she says yes.

"I tried to be," My mother answered carefully, "It was hard with my own problems but I did try."

   I nearly snorted at that but I didn't because that would have been embarrassing. The room was too quiet for something like that.

"With that being said, could you tell everyone what Summer's birthday is?" Nick gestured to me as he said that.

"August 4th," My mother replied confidently.

She was right.

   Nick nodded, "And what about her favourite colour?

   This one made my mother stop in her tracks. I didn't expect her to know this. To be honest, I would be surprised if she did know.

"I don't know," My mother admitted, "But what does that have to do with anything? I won't be able to learn about my daughter if you won't let me be with her."

Yellow. My favourite colour is yellow.

"You had your chance to get to know her, to be her mother," Nick retorted, "Fourteen years to be exact. What makes you think that you're going to be there for her now?"

"Because I'm better now," My mother responded quickly, "I was hurting before, especially after Stella's death. I wasn't functioning properly. I was thinking straight. I was in pain."

   Nick started to pace back and forth in front of her now, "So was your daughter. In fact, your oldest daughter, who had to raise her younger sister because of your negligence, actually ended up turning to drugs when you turned away during that time."

   This was new information for my mother as her face clearly said. Did she even know of my monster before this? I doubted that she did. Even when she did try to be invested in my life, she was fourteen years behind.

   That's fourteen years of catching up. I was missing one day of school and I was incredibly behind, I couldn't imagine fourteen years. 

But I could.

   I could imagine fourteen years because I had missed out on fourteen years of having a mother.

"I didn't know that," My mother said softly and turned her sad eyes to me, "I'm so sorry Summer..."

"It's a little late for sorries Ms. Collins," Nick told her shortly and then started walking away, "That's all."

~~~

"Dr. Robbins, can you tell us about the first time you met Summer?" Nick asked Arizona who was now sitting where my mother was before. 

   My mother had returned to her seat next to her lawyer and were both intently staring at Arizona who didn't seem to notice. Or maybe she did notice but just chose to ignore them.

"Summer was apart of a multiple casualty causing bus accident that was directed to the hospital I work at," Arizona explained, "I was one of her doctors."

"You said one of her doctors, who were the others?" Nick adjusted his glasses a little.

   Arizona nodded, "Dr. Hunt and Dr. Torres."

"As in Dr. Calliope Torres who is sitting right there," Nick pointed to Callie who remained calm next to me.

"Yes."