The World and Her Stars

Chapter Forty-Five

ROSE POV

The next few days were filled with training.

Training of the mind with occlumency lessons, in which Draco and I were the only two that excelled.

Practicing curses and hexes, and how well we could block them against one another.

Bellatrix loved when someone would hesitate and accidentally get hit with the torture curse. It's like she reveled in their screams. It was hard to watch at times but I kept a straight face.

The worst part was when the remaining prisoners were brought in.

I felt like vomiting as soon as I saw their defeated eyes. They were so similar to Katya's.

They knew they were going to die, and they accepted it. They wanted it. They needed it.

It destroyed me inside having to watch Draco, Blaise, Crabbe and Goyle kill for the first time. It made me sick.

Even from feet away, I could see Draco's hand trembling as he pointed his wand at the battered prisoner.

He tried to hide it, but it was clear in the expression on his face that he did not want to kill the man bowing on the floor in front of him.

"Do it, Draco..." Bellatrix whispered in his ear, "Make the Dark Lord proud..."

I squeezed my eyes shut and bit back heartbreak as I heard him cast the curse, but no matter how tightly my eyes were closed, I could still see the flash of green light that his wand produced.

I could still hear the prisoner's body hit the ground.

I even heard his last breath leave his lungs.

That night, I held Draco as he coped.

Coped with knowing that he had watched the life leave someone's eyes. Coped with the struggle of feeling like a murderer, and knowing you were really showing that person mercy.

We weren't killers. We were supposed to be studying for our exams and sneaking out late to go to parties and planning what we wanted to do for the rest of our lives.

We weren't supposed to be killing people.

I helped him tuck the feelings away, occlude them into oblivion so that he could breathe again, but he soon found out that just because the feelings are gone, doesn't mean the memories are.

My heart broke for him.

For the both of us.

"We are going to make it through this." I whispered, kissing the top of his head as it laid on my chest.

"We will." Draco tightened his arms around me and squeezed reassuringly.

God, I hope we make it through this.

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"Pansy, can you zip me up please? I can't reach the zipper in the back." I asked Pansy, motioning to the back of my dress.

"This dress does look absolutely gorgeous on you, Rose. It makes your eyes look marvelous." Pansy complimented.

I smiled warmly, "Thank you, Pans. And yours as well. Blue looks wonderful on you."

Pansy smiled back before returning to her makeup in the mirror.

"Rose...is everything alright with Blaise? He's just been...jittery all day. I hope nothing's wrong." Millicent asked, biting her lip nervously.