Exquisite

Rage

~Damen~

I sense of deja-vu swept over me as I sat as close as possible to the hospital bed, her slim fingers tightly clutched in mine. She looked so small in the sheets - buried in the fluffy duvets Cassien had insisted to be brought because Neith hated heavy and thick blankets. 

"The doctor said she'd be awake by now." I frowned, looking at the clock. She had been unconscious for more than two hours now and the anxiety which I had buried under layers of reassurance and her steady pulse under my fingertips was surfacing again. "Cass - why..." 

"D, you need to calm down." He said firmly as he gripped my shoulder. "She needs this rest." Beckoning to a silent Valdez who was standing quietly next to an asleep Vivienne, he exhaled. "What have you found?"

That was enough to get my attention. My hand that wasn't holding Neith's curled into a tight fist as I turned in my chair. 

"Who did this?"

I knew anger. It was a part of me, a fire that smoldered in the middle of my chest and while it could be tamed, it never went out completely. I had felt its singe many times but even my worst days didn't stand close to what I was feeling now. 

This was rage.
This was fury. 
And this time, it needed to be fed. 

"It's him." Valdez's jaw locked in place. "I found a cell phone this time, and there were ..." He visibly shuddered this time, the first time I had seen him this shaken in so many years. "Very specific instructions, Sir." 

He handed the cell phone to me, his eyes locked into mine. "If Miss La Rue hadn't done what she did, Miss Vivienne would have -" His eyes screwed shut as he took a slow breath. "I can never repay her for what she did today."

"None of us can," I murmured, trying to find the familiar distaste for him but failing to do so; I don't know if it was because of the fear in his eyes that I'd seen at the thought of losing my sister or the sheer relief when we found out she was okay. "Take some rest, Valdez. You need it too." 

I took a deep breath, bracing myself for the message that he wanted me to see. Cassien was leaning over me, his brows pulled together before I felt him stiffen. 

Get rid of the blonde. Bring the red alive. No matter what, don't mess up her face. 

"Damen."

"Damen, calm down. Leave the phone, D." 

"Damen." 

I realized with a start that the cell phone in my hand was skewed, my knuckles white from the strain as a crack that resembled a spider's web ran across the screen. "He wanted her alive." 

The words burned in front of my eyes, images of what they could have done to Neith running in my head like an infinite loop. "He wanted her." 

Cassien's eyes were hard, a vein popping on his forehead as he nodded tightly. "I'm starting to think that this attempt is for more than just Jordan's power. Did Neith ever tell you how she knows Marquis so well?"

I frowned, shaking my head. "She clams up whenever I try to broach the topic of her life before she met us." Furious pounding in my head began as I tightened my closed fist, "Do you think they were involved, in some kind of a ... of a relationship together?" 

Any response that Cassien must have made, however, was drowned out by the sudden pressure on my fingers and a raspy whisper. 

"Viv - Vivienne?"

I was on my feet in less than a moment, my heart thundering my ears as my vision went alarmingly blurry. "Hey." 

There was a shallow scrape across her chin and I could see the beginning of a bruise on her left cheek, but other than that there were no injuries on her face. "Hey." I realized I was crying when I saw a tear land on her little button nose, "You're okay." 

The panic in her eyes subsided as her gaze focused on me. "Is - is she okay?" She croaked, her throat moving. 

I had to stop myself from snorting as I slipped my hand under her jaw carefully, stroking her uninjured cheekbone. "Not even a scratch." I swallowed the lump in my throat. "Can't say the same about you, though." 

Her bandaged hand ghosted across my face, wincing slightly as the IV strained against her skin. "I'm sorry I scared you." Her eyes were damp, clear liquid pooling in the large pools of metallic blue. "I'm sorry I -"

"You're here." I kissed her slowly, languidly, tasting my own tears and hers before I wiped them away with my thumb. "I don't care about anything else."

"You scared us, Little Red." Cassien sat on the other end of the bed, stroking her hair as she craned her neck to look at him. "How do you feel?"

"Alive." She exhaled. "Everything hurts though, Cass."

I fought against the snarl that rose in the back of my throat. "Where?"

She took a shuddering breath, her eyes barely open. "Stomach, ribs ..." As if suddenly realizing what she was saying, she stopped. "But it's - it's okay. I'm fine."

"You're not." Her fingers were loosely entwined with mine and I held her hand as tight as possible without hurting her. "Just rest, okay? It'll feel better in some time."

She nodded weakly before her eyes fluttered open wide. "Can you stay? With me?" 

I raised an eyebrow. "Try and get me to leave."

I looked at Cassien. "Take Viv back home, yeah? She needs rest to recover, bring her back here tomorrow morning if she wants to her." He nodded, squeezing Neith's other hand gently as he left the room. 

I don't remember how long it had been till I kept watching her, the rhythmic rise and fall of her chest an indication of the fact that she was alive and breathing and how for now, it was more than enough. 

"Damen?" She whispered, barely audible.

I leaned into her, gently running my fingers through her hair. "I'm right here," I said quietly before pressing a soft kiss to her temple. "Do you need something?"

"Back then, in the alley," She broke off, taking a slow breath. "I was - I was scared." 

Fury climbed into my skull and tapped against my temples as I used every bit of self-restraint in me to not let it show. "I'm going to make them pay for what they did, you -" 

"No, not like that." She interrupted me. "No."

Her fingers gently traced the line of my jaw, moving to my chin and then resting on my cheek. "I was scared that I'll never get to see you again." 

"I don't know if it's too soon to say this," She continued gently, her voice so low that it was barely a whisper. "But all I know is when I thought I'd die, the only thing I wanted was to see you one last time." 

So many things I wanted to say, but the giant lump in my throat made it impossible to.

"I was so scared, Neith."

It was all I could manage, and from the look in her eyes, I knew she understood. "So fucking scared." 

"I think I'm falling in love with you," She smiled, slow and tired but so beautiful, I forgot how to breathe. "And I should have been terrified, but I'm not. Because it's you. You don't - "

She couldn't complete the sentence because I was kissing her, trying to let her hear the words I couldn't say because of how much I was feeling at the moment.

Her arms snaked around my neck and pulled me closer, her breathing heavy and eyes dark. 

I knew it then, knew that I wasn't falling in love with her. 

I already had.