mr. mara

•5•

[2 weeks later]

(Mr. Mara's pov)

Her coming here every night drives me insane. I'm glad that I'm able to help her, but it's getting to the point where I can't handle it anymore. She drives me absolutely crazy. I've never felt this way about someone before. I know that I shouldn't be this way because she is my student, but I can't help it.

Everything about her is just so fascinating to me. I feel like the majority of the time we don't even study. All we do is talk and I feel like I know absolutely everything about her.

She's going to be here any minute now. Part of me wants to tell her that I like her, but I would be crazy to do that. I'm her teacher and she's my student. I can't just tell her that I have feelings for her. That would be way out of line, but who cares. Other teachers have done it before, but then again they went to jail. I don't want to go to jail because I fell in love with a student, but then again what if I love her eventually? You can't help who you fall in love with.

"Mr. Mara!"

I snap out of my thoughts and I see her standing in front of me, "Uh, sorry. I was completely zoned out."

"It's okay," she chuckles. I love her laugh. I swear I won't be able to control my emotions anymore, "What's on the agenda today?"

"What do you think you need help on today?" I stand up from my desk and I sit down next to her.

"I don't know," she says. "I feel like I'm doing a lot better on everything."

"You are," I smile, "You might not need me to tutor you anymore."

"Oh," she says. "That would suck."

"How so?"

She looks up at me and frowns "You know exactly why it would suck."

"Yea," I sigh, "But there isn't anything we can do about it."

"I know," she says. "But it's so hard to understand that."

"It is," I say.

She looks down at the ground, "I told everyone that you would be nothing to me. I said that I wouldn't catch feelings for my hot math teacher."

"But you did," I add.

"I did," she smiles, "And now I can't have you."

"I can quit."

"No," she says. "I wouldn't make you quit just so you could have me. We don't even know if this would work. We don't know anything."

"I do know that I have feelings for you," I whisper.

"Then let's do it," she inches her face close to mine, "Nobody has to find out."

I try to control my breathing. It's hard to focus when she's this close to my face, "And if they find out?"

"They won't."

"You don't know that," I say. I rest my forehead onto hers, "Anyone could walk through that door and see us like this."

"There is a lock for a reason, Mr. Mara."

"Do me a favor and don't call me that anymore," I say.

She smiles, "Okay, Nick."

***

I walk into my tiny apartment and I lay down on the couch. I can't believe all of that just happened. I wanted to tell her so badly, but I knew that I couldn't because of the trouble we could get in. But she said it first and I knew exactly what she was talking about. I knew that I needed to agree with her in that moment. No matter how wrong it may be, I knew that I needed to tell her my feelings and tell her that I liked her more than just my student.