I'm Holding My Breath for You

Chapter 2

"Have you experienced something like this before?" he asks Chanyeol, his tongue not listening to him and slurring his words.

Kyungsoo wants to know about the strange dreams as much as possible. He's a bit drunk and Chanyeol's already closed the bar—they're walking home, the moon lazily rising in the sky.

"Have you?"

"No, that's why I'm asking—you're the unknown variable," Kyungsoo insists, annoyance audible in his voice. Chanyeol can be so needlessly uncooperative sometimes.

"I don't think I've shown up outside of someone's dreams before, but..."

"But?"

"I taught myself how to lucid dream when I was a teen and ever since I've been visiting people's dreams? At least, I think that's what happens? Quite frequently people tell me they see me in their dreams and I can remember it," he tells Kyungsoo, a wide grin making his dimple show.

Kyungsoo stumbles upon seeing it, his feet slipping on the concrete. He laughs when he feels his knees touch the ground.

"Are you alright?" Chanyeol kneels next to him. "Wait, are you drunk?"

"No," Kyungsoo laughs, betraying himself. "A little bit." He's too good at pretending to be sober, a lot of people don't recognize when he's blacking out, like right now.

"I genuinely wouldn't have realized—I mean, you're less grumpy, but wow. You don't even look or sound that drunk. You managed to fool a bartender," he laughs as well, his voice echoing through the empty street.

"The magic of a white, collared shirt and an expensive watch. You can get away with a lot of shit," he snickers. "I want to see you in my dream tonight," Kyungsoo confesses as he cups Chanyeol's face, his fingers sliding over a spot he'd forgotten to shave.

Nothing seems real in that moment, not the humidity in the air, not the way his clothes touch his skin, not the flickering street light behind them, its light distorting Chanyeol's features with a yellow glow. Neither does the way Chanyeol touches his cold hand and brings it to his chest instead like he wants to keep it there—in his heart.

Never before had Kyungsoo wanted to get to know someone so intimately.

***

Chanyeol lives in apartment building number 27/11 . That's the only detail Kyungsoo remembers from their walk home.

***

Kyungsoo inhales the bitter-sweet smoke into his lungs as he sits on the balcony in Chanyeol's apartment. He's afraid to look at the ground, his fear of heights getting the better of him. Every breath is a mumbled curse word in a language that's somewhat familiar to him, and his eyes are watering as he yawns for the hundredth time that evening.

"You never told me you had a dog," he slurs, no longer trying to cover up his state.

"It never came up." Chanyeol shrugs as he sits down next to him, Toben held tightly against his chest.

"I hate that you live on the eighth floor," Kyungsoo says, suddenly feeling like he can tell Chanyeol everything. Even that he'd worked on the top floor for three years and every day he had to fight the dull panic when using the elevator. "I can't even look down."

"You're scared of heights?"

"They fucking terrify me, we had a very tall tree in our backyard when I was a kid, I fell down from the very top when my cousin challenged me to climb it. I broke my left arm," he says, the words not wanting to leave his mouth.