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Like always, his day starts with a run. He hasn't really slept last night because he couldn't, and Harry had come too a many times knocking on the door with an audible whisper of, “Zayn, can we please talk? Please?”
There had been vehemence in Harry's voice, but Liam just lay there on the bed, clutching Zayn's pillow to himself, as he heard Harry come and go, not bothering to open the door and tell him how they had taken Zayn away from him.
The leaves crunch beneath his feet as he keeps jogging/running/rushing, the gush of hot wind and the intensity of sunlight bathing his face. Weirdly, it helps him forget things, it helps clear his mind, it helps him to stop from hitting something when he thinks about Louis, and how he has nobody on his side. Except Zayn.
He wants to talk to his mom, or his dad or even his sister about this. Because they are the only ones who he believes won't judge him, but he doesn't want to worry them. They already worry about him too much. His mom will probably just burst out crying if he as much as tells her what's going on. He isn't ready for more crying so he decides against it and just keeps running.
It's like his life, the running. Fast, nonstop, continuous. No breaks. Everything a fading blur. Not enough time to think, not enough time to wonder, not enough time to take a breath. Extracting the energy out of him, making him so tired that every particle in his body aches. It also comes with a thrill though. The rush. The escape. Adrenaline bursting through his veins. Making him smile so wide. Sometimes but. The other times, it's just quick, like a movie put on fast forward.
When he reaches home, he wants to just turn back and start running again. But the hope of Zayn calling him makes him step inside. Not a good decision.
The boys are sitting in the lounge, Niall with a box of cereal on his lap whereas Louis and Harry are sitting so close on the bigger couch, it's hard to tell who is who. They look up when Liam comes in and Louis instantly gets up.
“I know you are mad at me,” Louis begins, his hands squeezing each other, “But please listen to me?”
Liam just keeps standing, he is a little out of breath and a little sweaty and he doesn't know why but his feet refuse to listen to him when he tells them to take him back to his room.
“I am sorry Liam, I really am sorry,” Louis starts when Liam doesn't make any effort to stop him, “I was really- I felt betrayed and you know I love you both like a big brother and I couldn't believe Zayn would hide something like this from me. I thought you were just- just- just fooling around and one of you would get hurt because Zayn has this habit of thinking with his heart and you know, I didn't want him getting hurt.”
Liam opens his mouth to make a snide remark at that but Louis cuts him off before he can begin, “I know okay, I know what you are going to say. I take full responsibility for that. But I didn't mean to Liam, I thought Will would leave us alone to figure this out, I thought Zayn had a girlfriend so what damage could it do anyway. I didn't know they would take things that far. I'm so sorry and please also tell Zayn that when he wakes up because I don't know if I'll be able to face him.”
“Zayn is gone,” Liam says in a small voice, because he still doesn't want to believe in the truth.
“What?” it is Harry who asks that, also standing on his feet. Niall just looks at the scene before him with a mouthful of dry cereal.
“He is in London, he will come back today or tomorrow with Perrie,” he explains in a hard voice.
“Fuck,” Harry says. “When did he leave?”
“Last night,” Liam looks away from him.
“I am really sorry Liam,” it's Louis this time, “I am sorry because I know how you feel and I am sorry because I am such an asshole and I totally deserved this.” Louis points to the bruises on his eye and jaw.
Liam says, “Yeah, you did.”
“Please forgive me,” Louis pleads, “All of us for being such asses? You know we love you both, but we are also just humans and humans make mistakes-”
“Okay Lou,” Liam forces a smile, “You don't have to make speeches. I get it. It's okay, I guess. You can't undo what is done.”
“So we are okay?” Harry asks, not really believing that it would be this easy.
“I guess so,” Liam says. “I mean, I can't speak for Zayn.”
“I’ll take care of him,” Harry says, he looks really sure of himself.
“I am really sorry Liam,” Louis says again, timidly.
“Don't. Lets not apologize anymore,” Liam says, he just wants peace, and he also wants his friends back.
He watches when Louis leaves Harry's hand, Liam noticing for the first time that he had been holding onto him. It takes time for him to process what Louis is doing, as the boy somewhat tiptoes towards him, as if he is walking barefoot on burning coal, until he is standing in front of Liam. Then very cautiously, as if expecting Liam to push him away, he reaches out and hugs him.
Liam just stands there for the longest time doing nothing, realizing how this is the closest to home that he has felt since last night. He isn't alone. He was a jerk to think that he was.
Then he is putting his arms around Louis as well, and leans in to hide his face in Louis' shoulder before bursting into tears because time has stopped rushing once more, and its so calm and serene, Louis is holding him down, when all he wants to do is shoot towards the sky and disappear into the infinity of it.
He feels Harry's arms going around them too, strong and firm, before he hears the crunching of a packet and there's Niall too. Draped all over them, and smelling of Coco Pops.
He knows Zayn will be alright with them too, Zayn has a bigger heart than anybody he knows, and he will forgive everything in the blink of an eye. He knows, as he hugs Louis more tightly, as he holds onto his friends for the longest of times. Until Niall removes himself from them and then there are dry Coco Pops being pushed into Liam's teary face with an honest advice,
“Next time, just eat Coco Pops instead of being so fucking melodramatic!”
