The 3G Life: Two Buildings

Saturday 10 August 2019

Today is the start of my Eid vacation. But of course, my Eid will not go so well. Result is on thirteenth August. I wake up at 4:30am and offer my Fajr prayer. And then I pray to God over and over again that I may do a very good result. I know prayers from the heart are answered.

"So, the vacation will start from Friday," says Jabbar sir in the last class.

"Yeah, and when'll class start again?" I ask.

"Classes will start from 21st August."

"We've a pretty long vacation then."

"Yeah, but be sure to study and utilize your time."

But of course, I cannot concentrate. I just call up my aunt and grandparents and talk to them about how tensed I am with my result. I am tensed for myself, true, but I am also tensed for my friends. Out of all, Aayan and Saeed. I want Aayan to do better than me and I want Saeed to do a good result.

I even ask my aunt to pray for Aayan. And she assures me that she will pray for my prince. My aunt understands how much I love him and she also prepares to get me married to him. But of course, that is nothing but wishful thinking. I do not think that Aayan will ever even like me back.

"Hey Amber, can I talk to you?" asks Dalair the other day.

"Yeah, sure. What's it about?" I ask back.

"I can't say it here, shall we go upstairs?"

"Umm, sure. Shall we go to Sanctum?"

"Sure, I just need some privacy, that's all."

So, I bring him up in my father's coaching, Sanctum. I slide the door open and switch on the fan. And then I half close the door and sit directly in front of him. The receptionist come to check in and I tell him that I will leave soon. Then I look back at Dalair. I wonder what he will say to me.

The first thing he says is that he is not at all comfortable in this room. I reply that I am completely comfortable here. I see that he hesitates a bit but I cannot help it. I cannot put my reputation up at stake and take him to a more confined place. Dalair is a very distracting person.

I know Dalair wants to speak about something but cannot seem to start the conversation. So, I ask him if we can talk about his first kiss. He promptly says no and I decide not to push further. Then I ask him if he wants to be a pilot. He replies yes but also says that he may not become one.

I ask him the reason and he answer that it is because of his eyes. His eyes are not in good condition and he is not okay with wearing glasses. So, his eye sight decreases. I ask him to go and see a doctor and take glasses as soon as possible. I really want him to become a pilot.

I am very curious about what he wants to tell me. Then he asks if I knocked his best friend Nabila. I reply that I did. Nabila got into a relationship and I just wanted to congratulate her. Dalair says that it is much more complicated than that but he does not say anything further.

"Physical pleasure's very important to you?" I ask him.

"Well, it's just for self-satisfaction," he replies.

"Well, how important it's to you?"

"It's very important. Probably half of my life important."

"You know it's wrong, hmm?"

This sort of put Dalair on hold. I ask him if he feels guilty about it. He replies that different people have different views in life. He is a believer in God but he thinks God is already angry with him so he does not want to even try to take away His anger. But he does pray to God for his needs.

I ask him why did Ubaidah call him so many times from my phone the other day. He says that she just wants to talk to him. I ask him what she wants to talk about. He replies that he does not know. He did not have time so he took her leave. But I know the whole story. I know what Dalair thinks I do not know.

I still cannot understand what Dalair wants to talk about. I ask him if Nabila and he are just friends. He replies yes, they are just friends. I ask him if we are just normal friends. He replies yes, we are just normal friends. But at this point his voice quivers a little and he looks away from me.

It is time for me to leave so I extend my hand to say goodbye. Dalair takes it in his and holds it. He holds it and slowly traces his fingers along the upper part of my hand and palm. And then he holds me up to my wrist. His hand is so smooth and firm. For a moment I cannot take my hand away.

"I don't have much sensitivity in my hand," I say.

"I think I know that," he replies in an intense voice.

"I'm sorry. I can never be friends of benefits."

"I didn't ask you to."

"I'm very hard to be seduced, so stop trying."

With this I pull off my hand and we both come down the stairs and out of the gate. I can still feel his warm smooth hand. But I know it is just a mild physical attraction and not love. I know how long and how much Ubaidah loves him. I will not even dream to have feelings for Dalair.

Suddenly I remember Aayan. I love Aayan. And Iknow he is the love of my life. Maybe we do not have contacts with each other,but it does not mean he is not there. Maybe he tries to figure things out andmaybe he will come back. 3G building can take away people but not my feelings.