My Unfinished Symphony

I lost

Wilbur Soot Point of view,

My hands are shaking. I hear a faint siren, far away. I look at the gun I'm holding, the silencer on it worked better than without it, obviously. The eyes of the lifeless man on the floor are rolled back into their sockets. The man who is barely older than me, who now lies on the ground, with all his life sucked out of his corpse. He deserved it.

I grab him by his arms and throw him on the couch and drape a blanket over him. I can hear the sirens getting closer. I put my sweatshirt more above my nose, to hide my face a bit. I zip my backpack open while running out the door. The cool evening breeze hits my face, as I put my beanie over my head. I pause in my tracks for a second, to look up at the sky. It's a dark blue colour, mixed with the orange from the sunset.

It looks peaceful, it looks like the peace that I will never experience. A car zooms past my face, I realize that I have zoned out. The sirens are getting closer, the neighbours probably heard the noises coming from the other side of the wall. My eyelids are getting heavier by the second. I'm running down the street, getting back to my bedroom.

The streets are quiet and empty, all the street lamps are off. It feels like I'm trapped in a dream, my own dream. The adrenalin from 10 minutes ago still runs through my veins. It keeps my mind off the terrible things I have just done. From the crime, I just committed. I slow down a bit, my stamina is not great right now. I lean against a streetlight. For some reason, they are all off. The sirens are starting to fade away, I let out a deep sigh.

I walk in the dark alleyway and bow down to the height of my window. I left it open before I went out. I push the window open further and slide my body through it. I carefully stand on the carpet, trying to not wake any of my roommates up. The window slowly falls in its slot behind me. The light switch is on the other side of the room, so I slowly navigate through the furniture. I'm careful not to touch any walls, I haven't washed my hands yet.

I turn open the water tap and put my hands under it. The water soon turns a deeper colour of red, as I wash away all the blood. I look at my own reflection in the mirror. My hair is laying flat on my head because of my beanie. I look myself in the eyes, what has become of me. Is this the right thing to do? Maybe this IS a dream, an illusion. I have known all along. I will wake up and everything will be okay, everything will be completely fine. I will finally get rid of the voices inside of my head. Will I finally be normal, just a normal guy with no problems? A normal guy working in an office from 9 to 5, gets married and settles in for the rest of his life?

I look down at my arm and pinch myself, I feel a slight sting going through my arm. I pinch myself twice. The same thing happens, so this is real. I just killed a man, a human being. A breathing little bastard. Do I regret it? Deep down I know this is wrong but if I can't make people smile, I will make them cry. That is what I have always done, It is the bane of my existence. I hear rumbling coming from the sink. It's the pipes filling with water the rain pipe caught. I look out of the window. Water starts pouring down from above, it fits the mood quite well.

The white towel next to the sink is not white anymore so I take it with me. I have to b3e careful around the other people in my house, they can't know about this second me. I don't even know what will happen when they find out. Will they betray me and call the police or will they stand by my side and support me. I don't want to think about it, I don't know who I am without them, the people around me. My friends, if I can even call them that anymore. I have been neglecting friendships, I am too selfish and up my own arse to help keep it up.

My friends have been great to me, they are the thing that is keeping me up. The only reason I get up out of bed and do something on a day. They have all been lovely, except one of them. They are the reason I slipped into this phase. Why I am this terrible person that I hate so much. The personality that is consuming me from the inside out. Tommy, he needs to be gone, gone for ever. Out of sight, when he is finally gone, I can rest forever.