oliver woke up and humped his broom as part of his daily ritual. as he walked out of the gryfindor common room and saw the most beautiful girl he has ever seen. he decided he was going to propose to her on the spot.
oliver: marry me sexy mamas bebe
y/n: yes oliver i'm in love with you
they have sex in the middle of the great stair case
oliver: SAY YOU ARE MY BAKA
y/n: i-i-i am your baka daddy uwu
after that they immediately have their wedding in the great hall
as y/n walks down the aisle the frog choir plays galway girl by ed sheeran
snape: do you take oliver wood to be your wedded husband
y/n: i do daddy mamas
snape: do you take y/n to be your wedded wife
oliver: i- i- I CANT
oliver runs away
y/n: wait oliver
oliver runs back to his dorm
oliver: i couldn't do it, i love you do much
oliver sticks the broom up his ass, it escalated a lot from there
y/n walks in on oliver and the broom having sex
oliver and broom get married
dumbledoore is the god father to their child, quidditch cowboy sexy freddie
y/n has not found love since
THE END
