Collect of Short Stories

Truth Be Spilled

"You've thought about this, haven't you?"
     Evelyn stared blankly back, her arms limb at her sides, her mouth furrowed in a straight line. She had questioned truly how stoic she can force herself to be and was surprised to find her exterior was holding up well.
      Rafe's suicide attempt seemed to have sparked many people in the group to realize the importance of others. A thought often overlooked seeing as how they all know they will see eachother the next day...and the day after that. Nevertheless, it opened new wounds or exposed old ones. With Evelyn, the prior. Her mind, usually so sturdy and chained down to maintain stabilization was fragmented. Her emotions roared beneath her skin, a once calming ocean twisted and formed into a tsunami. It devoured and crushed every thought that wasn't Rafe out of her consciousness.
     And yet, there was no sign of anything having to possibly upset her. This, being usually something she prides herself in has become the very source of why she was unable to sleep the past couple of days. A daydream turned nightmare. What shielded her has now been used as a weapon.
      Every second where she allowed herself to remain quiet—a wallflower—is each second a knife digs deeper and deeper into her corrupted heart.
     "Of course I have. May we speak?"
      "Uh, yeah!" He hastily patted down the spot beside him on the bed. Evelyn has found his door unlocked, as per usual. She couldn't count how many times Lyra ordered them to lock but she was no snitch. There was no reason to correct him. Especially now.
      In one graceful fashion, she sat beside James, at least 2 feet of distance between them. Her back was rigid, like her spine was somehow made of steel. Her legs were crossed tightly. The pits for her eyes stared straight ahead.
     "This is our fault."
      The male feared those four words whether they were the truth or if they were lies. It scared him. And so after furiously working his jaw, forcing his mind to produce a counter argument, he jumped her case, his brows arching upwards as his lips strained down. His hands were clenched at his sides. Obviously he hadn't taken that fact lightly. "No! It isn't our faults! Any of our faults. Not even, Rafe. Nobody is to—"
      "Do you honestly believe that?" The usual bore that was present in all her sentences weight heavily. Evelyn flickered her eyes over to the male. It hurt to see such a happy man devoid of his roots. He was crestfallen, it showed on his face. How long has he fed himself the same lie over and over again?
     "This is our fault. We are all to blame except for him."
      "You don't know that."
      "But I do." She turned her head to face him fully. She doesn't blame him for using fuel that only covers the truth and layers the lies. It was the only way to keep people like him going instead of falling. But the truth has always served better than lies...at the end of it all. James even knew it himself. He just needed to hear it spoken out loud.
        "The cycle repeats itself over and over. The neglect we show..." it was the first time during this entire encounter that James finally saw the fault lines in the walls she made. The cracks that if not repaired soon, will send the whole thing tumbling down. But just as her vulnerability showed, it was gone in the next second. "We are to blame. Stop—don't say we aren't because you know we are. And even now, we're doing it. Tell me this: who is with Rafe right now?"
        James remained silent.
       "Exactly. And we're all dead set on doing our own shit," James narrowed his eyes. He had never heard her curse. "Look at us." Evelyn gestured to seemingly open air.
       "I go to you, you're alone. Maven is alone, Wyatt is with Petra. Lyra is with Jill and who is with, Rafe? Nobody."
      He was going to respond though only to fill in the silence. Her observation and dead set statement was nowhere near the lies he settled for himself. Words disappeared, defensive lines shattered. He had no argument against it and just as he was going to reluctantly agree, she asked: "Am I too quiet?"
       He widened his eyes, her mouth becoming slack jawed for only a second. This had nothing to do with the problem at hand? Nor what she just said? For a moment, he found it ironic how she was rambling about how they were all so self-centered but here she is, asking that question.
      But the thought didn't comfort him or soothe him in anyway. He answered reluctantly despite lying. "No. I don't think so."
      "You're lying." No signs of anger. She was simply calling it as a fact. He slumped his shoulders, already accepting defeat. Evelyn was great at reading people, only second to Valerie. That's a great feat...considering Val could read minds.
      "Sorry, I—" she gently placed a hand up in the air, as if petting an invisible animal. "No. I would have done the same. Like you, I am lying to myself and I must stop it. I should be more vocal, shouldn't I?"
       Her eyes became glazed over, her mouth still tightly locked. Was that a rhetorical question? Better thought, was she talking to him or herself? It didn't matter, he opted to answer anyways. "I don't see a problem with you being quiet. Why are you asking?"
      "I should have said more."
       Now he was truly clueless, a small escape from his overwhelming depression and concern from moments before. He wasted no time ignoring the momentary bliss. His mind ached with concern. What was she talking about?
      "What do you mean?"
       It was no more than 3 seconds but it felt like an eternity before she responded. Her jaw worked furiously, if only to relieve the tension. "I should have given context, my apologies. It's just...a few weeks back, I had stopped by his house. I just...I just wanted to check up on him was all. He looked terrible, which was to say, normal—" she cut herself short. She was unconsciously drifting off from he question at hand. And though she would normally beat around the bush when she sees fit, a strong part of her refused to get strayed. The more time she play around words, the more time wasted. Or, the more time Rafe has an opportunity to kill himself.
     "I talked to him. I talked to him about all the normal stuff you'd say to someone in that situation. That he will get better. That we're there for him. But what has that led to?"
      "Eve—"
      "I should've said something else but I don't know what I could've done!"
       "You didn't know!"
       "Ask Petra." She softly whispered, almost I inaudible. "Ask Petra and she will lie. She will lie and say I could've done nothing!"
      The shorter female abruptly stood up. For the first time during this entire encounter, her face was molded into something that closely resembled anger. Anger...such a simple word but watching someone like her who has never exemplified any emotions, it somehow increased James's fright by 10. He could practically see the roar of unconfined flames behind those eyes. "I could have stopped this but I couldn't! We're all to blame. We're all to blame especially me!" She casted her eyes downwards, a small gesture James was secretly thankful for.
       "An extra sentence...an extra...something! Anything! This could've have been prevented, James. Do you understand that?"