Ten Years (A Shoey Fanfic)

Chapter 2

The party was tonight, and I had no idea what to wear. Clearly this wasn't a formal party, but my flannel didn't seem very fitting either.
My phone let out a sharp bing, my text tone. I walked away from the mirror and checked my phone. There was a text from an unknown number.
'Hey! This is Gregg! Alice gave me your number, hope you don't mind! I was just wondering if you wanted to get something to eat before the party?'
I almost asked how Alice got my number, but I wasn't sure if I wanted to know. Instead I wrote back-
'Yeah, sounds good. I don't know anywhere around here though. Are the others going? Also what do I wear to this thing... Help!'
A few seconds later my phone went off again-
'Show up in lingerie'
I rolled my eyes even though he couldn't see.
'Be serious! I literally have never been to a party before.'
'Just hold on. I'm on my way to your house. You need serious help!'
I really didn't want to get up, but I supposed my mom wouldn't want me randomly bringing boys to the house, and a gay boy at that matter. I let out a sigh. The struggle of being a gay male, it was so devastating. I set my phone down and ran down stairs.
"Mom! Is it alright if I have a friend over?"
My mom perched her head up from the couch, "You already made friends?"
"Yes, I know. Three of them. Who would have thought I could make friends."
She rolled her eyes, "You know that's not what I meant."
"So... Can he come over?"
"Yeah. Sure. Just don't be too loud."
"What do you think we're going to do, mom. Bang?"
"I don't know. I don't know what to think of boys coming over anymore. Maybe you've had sex with all your male friends."
"That's me mom, such a man slut. Anyway, I'm going to tidy my room." That was a lie, but I wasn't ready to hear mom's abstinence speech again.
"Be good!" She shouted as I walked up the stairs.
I lay on the bed, thinking of the party tonight. And what we were going to do. And Joey. And how beautiful he was...
No, no, no. Clearly he's into girls, and he's a huge asshole. I don't know what he did to Alice but it seems bad. I can't fall for a straight guy, I can't. Maybe I could date Tubby Tom, but he really isn't my type. And there's always Gregg... But he's not really my type either and it might ruin one of the only friendships I had.
The doorbell rung and shook my sad dating life out of my head. I got up and ran downstairs. I avoided mom's 'use protection' comment and headed to the door. I flung the door open to see Gregg leaning against the wall with his hand on his hip, "Are you ready to be beautified?"
I laughed, "Should I be scared?"
"Maybe."
I laughed a little more, "Come on," I opened the door farther. He walked in, and I shut the door behind him.
"Follow me, my room's up here." I walked him up to my room, and Gregg followed behind me.
I barely opened the door when Gregg pushed past me and ran inside my room.
I cleared my throat uncomfortably, "Um.. Welcome to my room?"
He threw open my closest, "Alright, let's get down to business."
I shut the door and took a seat on my bed, "Alright. Work your magic."
He began throwing things out of my closet, "Alright, we have to go shopping together sometime."
"Sorry, I'm not gay enough."
"I'm so ashamed."
"I often shame the gays."
He tossed things aside more, "Your wardrobe is sad and pathetic and straight."
I stared at the roof as I listened to the sound of him ripping more clothes out of my closet. And then I heard him shout in glee, "Yes! Yes! Yes!" He took out a faded grey t-shirt, then proceeded to take out a leather jacket.
"I forgot I had that. I got it since I was in the play Grease at my old school."
"You played Danny? He's my absolutely favorite!"
"Ha! No, I sucked at drama. I played a background character."
"Pooey. Well, now you have a relevant reason to wear this beauty. Here, put this on." He tossed the jacket and shirt at me.
I held them in my hands, but hesitated to change.
"Are you bashful to change in front of me? I get it, I'm gay, but it's not like I'm seeing you naked."
Slowly, I let my hands grab the seam of my shirt.
"Do you need me to turn around?" He sighed.
"No," I said, yanking the shirt over my head, "I'm fine." But still, quickly I threw the other shirt on and pulled on the jacket.
"I knew it."
"What?"
"You look fabulous, my friend. I did great."
I stood up and looked in the mirror, "I look stupid."
"No. You look great. You are beyond ready for this party."
-
Gently, I touched the sleeve of my jacket. So much happened that night. That night that started everything. There were two nights I will never forget, and that was one of them.
I allowed myself to calm down before hitting the road again. I've got a long road ahead of me.
-
The inside of Gregg's car smelled of men's cologne and old McDonald's french fries. The seats were purple leather, and it made me laugh. This guy was so flamboyantly gay.
"So, I was thinking milkshakes. Yes?" Gregg slid into the drivers seat.
"Yeah, sure. Are the others coming? You never answered that part of the text."
"Oh... no, I thought we could just go the two of us." He started the ignition.
"That's fine," I shrugged, "Where's the best place to get milkshakes in town?"
"You'll see. Buckle up." I obeyed his orders, then leaned my seat back. The windows were slightly cracked, causing my hair to swoop to the left.
Gregg removed one hand from the steering wheel and turned on the radio. I didn't recognize any of the songs. Gregg listened to metal. I couldn't hear any of the words, just yelling. But Gregg knew every word. I watched as he lightly banged his head to the beat. He could be singing the words completely wrong, and I would have no idea. This music was so foreign to me.
"Here it is," He broke his singing, "Welcome to King Milkshake."
I peeked up at the building, and I stifled a laugh. It was a small, run down building with no indoor sitting areas. There was one window, that a long line of people stood outside of.
"Wow, this is not what I was expecting."
He gasped, "How dare you judge a book by its cover, Shane. You have not lived until you have tried a King Milkshake."
I shrugged, "At least I can tell my mom I finally lived."
Gregg smiled, "Well come on, let's go!"
I grinned slightly and jumped out of the car. By the time my feet hit the floor, Gregg was power skipping. I shook my head and snickered. I had to admit, his enthusiasm made me smile.
I jogged slightly to catch up.
"The line is worth it, trust me."
"It better be."
"It is," A girl standing behind us chirped, "It's the best milkshake you'll ever have."
"So I've heard."
"Your that new kid, right?"
"Yeah, that's me," I said trying to sound enthusiastic.
"I'm Jane Quinn, student president, president of NHS, three year winner of the national math competition, and leader of the Jesus is our Savior club," She spoke so fast I struggled to keep up. She held out her hand, and I awkwardly I shook it.
"Um, I'm Shane... I can cook mac and cheese without looking at the box."
She burst out laughing, flipping her hair in the process. I nervously laughed along. "Well, there's no way to get you into student counsel at this point. But the Jesus is our Savior club is always welcome to newcomers." She reached in her purse and handed me a pamphlet. There was a picture of a cross, and in comic sans font were the words "Jesus loves you."
"Uh, thanks. But um, I'm busy on Tuesdays."
She made an exaggerated pouty face, "Pooey. Well, if your free one day you are always welcome to stop by."
I was about to say something when I heard Gregg speak, "What do you want?"
"Uh," I studied the menu quickly, "Cookies and cream."
"One medium cookies and cream, and one medium strawberry banana." He handed the old dude at the counter the money before he even said the total.
"Keep the change, George."
"Why thank you, Gregg."
I reached into my pocket and pulled out three crumpled dollar bills, "Here, Gregg."
"Oh no, no, no," He waved his hand, "It's my treat."
"Here you go boys," George handed us our drinks, and I smiled in thanks. As we walked away, Jane gave me a wink, and I gave her an uncomfortable smile.
"So basically Jane Quinn is in love with you."
"Really?" I choked.
"Yep."
"Leader of the Jesus is our Savior club," I snickered, "I wonder what she'd think of me if she found I was gay."
"Well if I were you I wouldn't consider it a good conversation starter."
I laughed lightly, then took a sip of my milkshake.
The shake was so thick and creamy, and the oreos melted in my mouth. The ice cream was sweeter than anything I've ever tasted.
"Oh my fucking God," I looked at Gregg, "I have lived."
-
I looked out my window. Ha, speak of the devil.
Quickly, almost illegally, I turned abruptly into King Milkshake's parking lot.
There were still a lot of teens in line. In the mix, I expected to see Gregg. I looked at the line of teens but only saw the faces of those who were teens ten years ago.
I saw Gregg first. Laughing and sipping on his strawberry banana shake. Then I saw Jane, flipping her hair and whipping out her most flirtatious smile.
But then the faces changed. I still saw Gregg and I, but he looked at me different. We were standing closer then we were before. In that same mix I saw Joey and Amanda making out on one of the tables.
The faces changed a third time. This time I was standing next to Joey. Both of us laughing and smiling.
And then a fourth time. This time it was Alice, Amanda, Gregg, and I sitting at a table. But this time, Gregg was distant. We didn't sit near each other or even look at each other.
I opened the car door and got in line.
"Shane?" I heard the lady at the counter say. I looked up to see a peppy girl with long blonde hair and bright green eyes.
"Jane?" I almost laughed. What a small world.
"I haven't seen you in ten years. Here, I'll whip you up a cookies and cream milkshake on the house."
"Thank you. And hey... We should catch up sometime."
She glanced at the ice cream cone clock behind her, "My break is in five minutes, how about then?"
I almost told her I couldn't. That I was busy. But I did have time to kill, and maybe it would be good to talk to her, after all she did for me... It was the least I could do.
"Okay," I smiled at her.
-
"That jacket looks hot on you," Amy smirked, "If you weren't gay I might bang you."
I shrugged, "My sexuality gets in the way of everything."
"Guys, focus. Shane looks great, whatever. I have one thing to say before we get in... Act natural," Alice made eye contact with all of us.
I took in a deep breath and nodded.
I don't think I exhaled till we reached Amanda's house.
"Target spotted," Alice murmured, "Amy work your magic. Everyone else... I'll meet with you later. Remember, act natural."
I glanced at Gregg one last time before heading away. I felt so out of place. Everywhere I went there were drunks shoving tongues into each other's throats and grinding to the beat of the blasting music.
I pushed my way past the people to an empty part of the room. I watched as Amy, in her strapless skin tight leather dress, strut over to Joey who sat on the couch next to Amanda.
I couldn't hear them, but Amanda looked pissed, and Joey was smirking.
Amy was sitting on her knees, whispering things into his ear, then she bent forward, revealing her pink thong, and whispered in his other ear so her breasts were shoved in his face.
I watched as his hand moved up and grabbed on to one of them. Amanda shouted something I couldn't hear, then stood up and barged to the drink table.
Amy moved from next to Joey to physically on top of him, moving her hips against his lap.
For some reason it wasn't just Amanda who was upset, I was to. I darted my eyes away from the scene.
It's just an act, I reminded myself. Also, he's straight. I shouldn't even be worked up over this.
I took in a deep breath, then headed to the drink table myself.
Amanda was taking shots, a circle of people around her were cheering. I had never drank before, but if I were to get through this night I didn't see another option.
I grabbed one of the plastic cups and picked up a bottle of what I thought was vodka.
I poured some in my cup, and I cautiously brought it up to my lips. Even the smell burned my nostrils. I tilted my head back and let the liquid trickle down my throat.
I immediately fell into a spit of coughs. I had go clutch my knees just to get a hold of myself.
"First time?" A slurred female voice asked.
"Yeah," I coughed, "how do you do this?"
I looked up to see a smirking Amanda standing only inches away from me.
"You get used to it."
"I don't even know if I want to."
"Sure you do, it really gets your mind off things. Tonight I expected took hook up with Joey but apparently Amy stole the stage. Honestly, she is such a sl-" She paused for a moment, "I'm sorry. You must be sad too. I saw you staring at them."
"What?" I said, shocked. No one else could know I was gay, not yet. I wasn't ready for people to think I was in love with Joey either.
"I saw the way you looked at them. Amy is hot and all, but she is a total whore. Being the new kid and all, you don't want to get mixed up with her." I let out a sigh of relief. She thought I was into Amy, she thought I was mad because I was into her. I almost laughed.
I cleared my throat and forced a sad facial expression, "She's just so beautiful. I just... I just wanted it to be me."
Her hand was on my shoulder now, "You could do... So much better." Her fingers trailed down my chest as she spoke.
I felt a lump in my throat.
"You know... I have the perfect cure for your sadness," She whispered slowly into my ear.
"W-what?"
She smirked, "First, take a shot." She filled one of the shot glasses and handed it to me, her hand not leaving my chest.
Cautiously, I took the shot and struggled to keep it down.
"Good," She pressed her body next to me, "Now... You kiss me."
I couldn't get any words out before her lips reached mine. She wrapped her arms around my neck, bringing my closer to her. I was hesitant at first, but if I wanted to seem straight this is what I had to do. No straight guy would turn down making out with Amanda.
Her lips moved against mine, and her tongue slipped lightly into my mouth.
The whole time I thought about just how small girls lips were.
Then I realized this was just the start, as her lips were moving so slowly, giving me long kisses.
She was expecting me to make the first move.
I fastened the kiss and deepened it in the process.
She grabbed my hand and moved it onto her breast.
These things are so weird. I had to stop myself from saying it out loud.
I tried to mimic the way Joey was caressing her earlier.
I looked around and realized my eyes were wide open but hers weren't. I glanced around, and saw Alice and Gregg standing next to each other giving me odd looks.
I shrugged at them.
Then, Alice started to approach me and I moved my hand away from Amanda's boob.
"Hey sorry to interrupt, but we have to go now."
"Sorry, Amanda. It's been great, but-"
"No worries," She smirked, "Later new kid."
As we walked away Alice hit me hard in the shoulder and I winced lightly, "What the fuck was that? Are you straight now?"
"God no, I just-"
"Just drop it, I don't care. We have business to attend to, got the camera?"
"Yeah," My heart pounded remembering what was about to happen, "Are they in there?"
"No, but they will be soon," Gregg spoke up. I felt guilty for forgetting he was there.
Joey had once again occupied my thoughts.
"How do you know?"
"He's fingering her," Alice spat, "That's the beginning of a..." She paused and then continued bitterly, "Night of adventure."
"What do you have against Jo-"
"Shh," Alice threw her hand over my mouth, "This is the room."
Slowly, she opened the door. The room was typical. A few painting and a queen sized bed. It was empty, which was weird because I was just in a room full of people trying to get rooms. Why had no one checked here?
"Hurry guys, get in," Alice was standing in the closet, green silly string at the ready. I felt a lump in my throat.
The closet was a white sliding door with three openings, so we could see everything, so we could act out the plan.
It made almost too much sense.
I flipped out my camera, and shakily pressed the record button.
I raised it to the three slits in the door. My knees began to shake and I swore I was going to vomit.
And then they came in, and my whole body shut down.
Why was I doing this? It's so wrong. I should go.
But I never did.
Joey was holding Amy, her legs wrapped around his waist. He struggled to get her on the bed as she passionately attacked his mouth with hers.
When he did manage to lay her across the mattress, she immediately began to rip his clothes off.
First, it was the shirt. And then the pants. And then his checkered boxers.
And once again, I was struck by his beauty. Even with nothing covering him, I saw no flaws in his perfect figure. He was radiant.
And as soon as everything came off, and he began to slide her dress down, the closets doors slid open, and reality hit me like a rock.
Silly string, flew from the cans and onto his hair and body. Everyone was laughing. Everyone except me. I stood there, camera in hand, trying to find a way to convince myself he deserved this.
But what had he ever done to me? Hell, what did he do to Alice?
"Stop," He flared his arms and yelled, "What the fuck, Alice? Is this your idea of revenge. I didn't want a relationship, you knew that! You didn't have to be so fucking bitter about it!"
"Oh whatever. You are a liar and a cheater and an ass," Alice shoved him slightly, "And you're telling me you don't deserve just a little silly string in your hair."
"I-"
"No, you're right. You see, this video is going up, for everyone to see. Joey Graceffa, how does it feel to be humiliated?"
Joey slammed his foot against the wall. I was too frozen to turn off the camera.
"And you," He pointed at Amy who lay with her dress pulled halfway down her breasts, "I'm telling everyone you have chlamydia."
She shrugged, "Wouldn't be the first time."
He rolled his eyes, "And Gregg? Your probably just here so you can see my dick, is that right fag?" I winced at the word. I have Gregg a sad look. Joey shoved Gregg and he winced, "Well look, here it is. Take a good long peek, because you'll never get to see it again."
Lastly he turned to me, his expressions softened, "And you, Shane? I know I don't really know you, but you at least seemed like a good guy. I thought you'd be different."
My heart plummeted. So desperately I wanted to shout out, "I am different. This isn't me, I promise!"
But nothing came out. I just stared at the camera, and my finger limply pressed the button that stopped the recording.
He cleared his throat, "Now get the hell out!" His voice was booming. It felt as if I just got slapped in the face. As everyone snickered, I slowly backed out of the room. The minute the door closed, I heard a muffled sob.
I felt terrible.
"Ah, what a success! I can't wait to upload that bad boy!" Alice shouted in triumph.
"How about some booze to celebrate at my place? And it'll be way stronger than this shit they serve here," Amy said. I noticed she had not pulled her dress up yet. I don't think she cared.
"Hey guys, I think I should get going. I'll just give you the video tomorrow."
"Do you need a ride?" Gregg spoke, concerned.
"No, I'll just walk."
"It's really dark and you don't exactly know your way around, just let Gregg take you," Alice raised her eyebrow.
"No, I live far off. I'll have my mom pick me up at a gas station or something. I'll call you if I get lost."
They looked hesitantly at each other and then nodded.
"Be safe," Alice pointed a finger at me, "And don't lose that video."
"Yes ma'am."
They all gave me a wave before heading out the door. And as soon as they left, I headed back to the room where I last saw Joey. I couldn't go without making this right.
I took a deep breath, and opened the door. The music muffled, but it was replaced by something else. Moaning.
The shaking bed answered the question.
"Oh my God, someone just opened the door," I recognized the voice to be that girl Sally's from health that was doing the same thing with Joey earlier. Wow, two in one day. Good job.
"Fuck, is it Joey?"
"He stormed out! I saw him get in his car!"
"Oh, um, sorry... I was looking for the bathroom. I'll let you two be."
I quickly ran out of the room, and pushed through all the drunks to get to the front door.
Joey couldn't have left yet. I couldn't let him leave thinking I was that same boy filming that prank. Whoever it was, it wasn't me.
I peered into all the cars poorly parked along the street, but none held Joey. They were all empty or filled with couples banging in the back seat.
And then I heard it. A muffled sob. The same muffled sob I heard earlier, and I began to follow the noise.
It led me a black mustang, I peered into the tinted windows, and I barely managed to make out his beautiful hair.
I inhaled and opened the passenger seat.
"Hey... Joey," I spoke barely above a whisper.
"What do you want asshole, where are your friends? I'm done playing your games. Get the hell out of my life."
"I left them. Joey, I'm so sorry. I'm not like them."
"Then why did you do it?" His voice shook.
"Mind if I come in?"
He sighed, "What have I got to lose anyway."
I climbed into the passenger seat and shut the door, "I'm not like other kids. I thought maybe if I didn't do this prank I'd lose the only friends I had. Now I see it's not worth it..."
"What, can you read minds or something?"
I stifled a laugh, "No. I just have different... preferences."
"We all have different preferences, Shane. Your not apart from the rest, so calm down."
"Well... Maybe my preferences aren't really accepted by others."
He sighed, "I know the feeling. People are pricks."
"Tell me about it."
There was a moment of silence before he spoke, "How do I know your not?"
"Not what?"
"A prick."
I laughed slightly, "Would a prick do this?" I took the memory chip out of my camera and chucked it out the window.
He looked away, "What are you going to tell the others?"
I shrugged, "I guess I forgot to hit record."
"So you're not going to tell them you helped the enemy?"
"Well, I could..."
"No. It's okay. I wouldn't either."
"I feel like an ass."
"You should, I got silly string up my asshole."
I laughed and shook my head, and he laughed a little too.
"Hey, I was not in control of the silly string."
His tone shifted into a more serious one, "But you could have stopped it."
"Your right, I should have."
"I said you could have, not should have."
"Huh?" I turned to face him.
"You got to do what you got to do at this school. Even if it means hiding who you really are."
I shook my head, "No amount of popularity could make up for the pain hiding yourself causes."
I heard tears in his voice, "Not when your like me."
Without thinking I rested my hand on his shoulder, "Fuck everyone and what they think of you."
"Forget it, you don't know what it's like to hide something your whole life. For what, to be cool? To be popular?" He wiped a tear, "To survive?"
"Yes I do," I spoke softly, "And I'm beginning to do it again."
He turned to face me, "I don't think you know what I mean."
I locked my eyes with his, "Try me." My voice quivered. His eyes were so beautiful.
"Okay," his voice was hushed. Slowly, he got closer and closer to me, so close I could feel his unsteady breath against my face. And then his forehead touched mine, and my heart stopped. I tried to catch a breath but I couldn't. I couldn't gather words in my head. But I didn't move.
Then, his hand trailed up my face, and his lips moved forward onto mine, and everything became clear again.
I felt every emotion all at once. His lips were touching mine softly, and as soon as I returned the kiss they pressed more deeply. The kiss deepened, and I leaned across my seat just so I could get closer to him.
His hand traveled up my thigh and he removed his lips from mine, "You know how far making out typically leads me, you don't have to... if you don't want to."
I knew I should have said something but his thumb was rubbing circles in my inner thigh and I don't think I could say no. I didn't want to. And I know losing your virginity is supposed to mean something but in this moment right now I was feeling everything. I couldn't even say the words so I just dipped my lips into his,
and I could feel the smirk beneath them. That same smirk that had been used on countless girls countless times but for some reason this felt different. And why, because I'm a guy? Or because deep down I wanted this to be something.
"Not here," His voice shook, "Not a car. Not for your first."
"How do you know this is my first?" I tried to sound as if his statement wasn't true, but I knew it was.
"Please," He snickered, "You have the word virgin written all over you."
I sat up and sneered, "Fine, maybe I am. But what about you, have you ever done it with a guy before?"
He turned on the ignition and put on his seat belt, "I've done anal with girls before, how different can it be?"
"I'll just heighten my voice a little, I don't know what you'd do about the whole penis thing though."
He laughed, "Penises. Always getting in the way."
"Yeah, getting in the way of my sexuality." And in those words I lost all breath. Clearly he must know I was gay, but now that I said it out loud and there was no going back.
"Me too," His voice was soft. I looked at him, but I didn't say a word. I didn't want to push him and ask why have sex with all these women if your not even interested. But there was no reason to ask. Coming out is the biggest hell of your life, it's almost better to avoid it. Sometimes I wish I did.
After a moment of silence I spoke, "Are we going to your house?"
"No. I don't want to... Not with my parents around."
"Where then?"
"We own this cabin. It's out by the lake, we'll be completely isolated."
"Are you sure you won't slaughter me?"
"Positive," He snickered.
I shut my eyes. I wanted the car ride to end so I could do everything with Joey, but it was the exact same reason I didn't want it to end. I've never been more terrified.
"Nervous?"
"How did you know?"
"Your leg is shaking vigorously," I looked at my shaking laughed and laughed nervously. I set my hand on my leg, trying to get it to stop.
"Here, music always calms me." He turned on the radio. I shut my eyes again and listened to the words and listened to the words of I Want to Know what Love is and the irony of it. It was such a cheesy song, but hearing Joey hum the tune made me smile.
And when the song stopped so did the car. And suddenly my heart was racing again.
Joey opened the car door, and then got out and opened mine. He pulled me out, and passionately pressed his lips against mine. I pulled myself closer by wrapping my arms around his back.
"Hey, I'd have sex with you right here but I think you'd rather do it in a bed," He murmured. I laughed nervously, and followed him into the log cabin.
The inside was beautiful and cozy. Pictures of him and his family hung around the fireplace and lighting fixture hung right above the red couch.
He grabbed my hand and led me into a room in the back of the cabin before I could get a better look.
Softly, he moved his hand from mine and placed both of them on my hips and laid me gently against the bed.
I couldn't control my breathing but he didn't seem to mind. His hands fumbled with my shirt, but he managed to pull it up above my head. I had no idea what happened to my jacket, but it must have fell off in the car.
He kissed me hard against the lips, and then my jaw, and the all the way down my neck and chest till his lips landed right above the waist line of my jeans.
He looked at me, and I nodded at him. His hands cautiously unbuttoned by jeans and slid them down, and my boxers went with them. I lay bare for Joey Graceffa, and he stared in wonder. In that moment, I began to take his clothes off, layer by layer, till both of were bare naked.
"Are you sure," His breath was hot against my neck, "It's okay if your not ready."
But I wasn't sure if I missed this opportunity I'd ever get it again. And God, I wanted it.
"I'm ready."

A/N SO SORRY SCHOOL GOT IN THE WAY BUT WILL TRY TO GET THIS GOING AGAIN. SORRY FOR THE WAIT!