vent. <3
you stress me out,
you kill me,
you drag me down,
you fuck me up.
we fought and fought, never ending. why does it never end? why can’t we just get along? please, please, please, i just can’t take this guilt. its too much, everything hurts. i’m a terrible person, i hurt him.
we're on the ground we're screaming
“OFC I FUCKING DO! I FEEL SO FUCKING BAD THAT I HURT YOU. IM SO FUCKING SORRY I WISH I DIDN’T FEEL THIS EMOTION. IM SORRY FOR BEING A TERRIBLE PERSON. IM SO SORRY!” i shouted at him, waiting for his response as he slowly typed one out. tears rolled down my face
“if you did care you would do something for me that you’ll never fucking do.”
i laughed to myself, is he fucking serious?
“LIKE WHAT? GIVE UP THE PERSON I LOVE WITH ALL MY HEART?!”
i don't know how to make it stop!
“why can’t we just move on..?” he typed out, clearly very upset.
“because, you won’t let me. im trying. IM TRYING SO FUCKING HARD. WHY CAN’T YOU MOVE ON? STOP HURTING ME, STOP GUILT TRIPPING ME. PLEASE.
i love it, i hate it.
“i love you so much” i typed to him,
“I LOVE YOU MORE. HAH!” i giggled to myself
…
“don’t say you love me when you dont mean it. don’t say you love me when you hate me. i love you so much but not the way you do and it hurts.”
and i cant take it.
i sat crying in my bed, all of the times he’s manipulated me. making me come back to him, it all hurt. i should just block him but i know i’ll hurt him.
but i keep on coming back to you.
“no, no, no, no, no, please don’t go.. i love you so much. please, i can’t handle a day without you.” he typed to me, full of emotion and regret. but it felt like he wanted to scream at me, take out all his anger at me. like he always does.
“fine, i won’t take a break, ig. i love you too..”
