realization - iwaoi

chapter one

"You're up early, Hajime." Iwaizumis mother said with a smile on her face. He gave her a small smile in return and nodded. His mother knew he wasn't much of a talker and this silent interaction was perfectly common for the two to have. But she did notice the dark eye bags under her son's eyes and the way his eyes were a bit more swollen than usual.

Deciding that she could trust Hajime to come to her himself if he was in any sort of serious trouble she pointed at the breakfast she had prepared for her son.

Without even looking at the breakfast he stepped out of the front door and sat himself down on the porch. He left the door ajar so that his mother would not worry about him but to still have some sort of barrier between the two. He was sure that if he had to look into her eyes longer he would break out crying and spill things he couldn't even admit to himself.

The "porch" as Iwa called it really only consisted of three stone steps but as his family did not have a balcony or garden this was quite the luxury for Iwaizumi. It provided the perfect mixture of privacy as well as fresh air and comfort.

Iwaizumis head was buzzing with thoughts but he didn't want to think so he took his phone out and put on some music.

The sun had risen about an hour earlier and was still hiding behind some white puffy-looking clouds. A soft breeze crumpled up Iwaizumi's white shirt and the smell of a new day was in the air.

He heard a few confident steps approach him.

"You wanna practice, Iwa-chan?" A sudden voice made him look up and into the face of his best friend. He should've guessed Oikawa would turn up at his house at some point of the day.

Oikawa's shirt hung from his torso in a way that made Iwa's heartbeat pick up. The way he could just make out an ab or two made him so dizzy he stood up quickly. Because of his position on the steps, Iwa towered over Oikawa and he was able to see the top of his best friend's head. Oikawa's hair always looked soft and fluffy and reminded Iwa of the clouds that partially hid the sun.

"Sure I'll go and grab my things. Come on." He interrupted his thoughts, opened the door, and gave his mother a small smile.
"Toru and I are going training." He said to her as he walked into his room, leaving Oikawa to talk to his mom. The two of them got along perfectly well as they knew each other as long as Oikawa and Iwa knew each other.

Their families had even become friends over the years making the two of them closer and closer.

In his room, Iwaizumi swiftly took off the shirt he had slept in and changed into some fresh shorts. The air hit his bare chest and he felt goosebumps rise in his skin.
When he opened the door to his closet to also pick out a new shirt Oikawa entered his room grinningly and stopped in his tracks when he saw a half-naked Iwaizumi standing in front of his closet. His grin dropped from his face and his jaws dropped slightly.

For a second their eyes met and Hajimes's heart was close to jumping out of his chest but then a grin formed on Oikawa's lips again. A blush crept up Iwa's neck and reddened his cheeks.

"You're taking forever, Iwa-chan."

The slight blush that had formed on Iwaizumis cheeks was burning now and Iwa turned to his closet again in a robotic motion without looking at Oikawa again.

The taller boy went over to the unmade bed and plopped himself down on one side, supporting his head with his hand.

He watched a still naked chested Iwa going through his closet and finally picking out a shirt. His back muscles bulged with every move he made. Oikawa had seen Iwaizumi naked plenty of times but the intimacy of being alone in a room, as well as weird dreams he had the previous night, made him watch the way Iwa's muscles moved when he threw on the shirt and how his hair was still a bit disheveled looking.

"Toru stop fucking staring and let's go." Iwaizumi's voice let Oikawa snap out of his trance. He pushed himself up from the bed, noticing the discrete scent that was uniquely Iwaizumis. A small smile formed on his lips.
It was funny how he never really noticed how much he liked Iwa's scent.

But Oikawa liked everything about Iwaizumi. He didn't always let it show but he was Iwa's greatest admirers. Where Iwa lacked in fangirls he made up for it by the admiration of the one and only Oikawa Toru.

"Shittykawa I said stop staring and let's go."
A rough hand wrapped itself around Oikawa's small wrist and pulled him through the bedroom door.

Iwa's mother gave Oikawa a small smile and when the two of them were out the front door waved goodbye.

Iwaizumi wasn't showing it but he was happy Oikawa had picked him up. He loved listening to Oikawa talk while they were walking to school. One of the reasons they were friends in the first place was that Iwaizumi rarely talked and Oikawa never knew how to shut up.

"So about the double date-" Oikawa started but a shocked intake of breath by Iwaizumi interrupted him.
"Why are you acting so surprised Iwa-chan. You agreed to it yesterday. How have you forgotten already."

Iwaizumi tried to remember what Oikawa was referring to as he had no recollection whatsoever of agreeing to go on a bouble date with Oikawa. Suddenly he realised that it must've been the question he had so hastily agreed to because he hadn't payed attention to what Oikawa had been saying.

Ugh- that was why Oikawa had acted so surprised at his agreement. He should've know.

"Oh yeah, right." He muttered, no chance of getting out of this now.

"So I was thinking of getting over with it quickly but I think this could be a good opportunity for you to score with a girl." Toru grinned at his shorter friend and patted his head. Iwaizumi slapped his hand away and gave Oikawa an annoyed look.

"I don't wanna 'score with a girl' Loserkawa." He told him with a dismissive look and a shrug of his shoulders.
It was really uncomfortable for him to talk to Oikawa about girls because he had no experience whatsoever and really no interest in it either. Oikawa however had done it all and wasn't shy on telling Hajime all about his sexual experiences.

"Sometimes I wonder what's wrong with you Iwa-chan." He said and Iwa's throat was slowly closing up.

Somehow this all was making his chest pain worse and giving him the urge to sob and cry. He couldn't understand why- he didn't want to understand. He just did not want to think about what he was feeling and why he was feeling it.

"Shut up Loserkawa." He said instead and gave Oikawa what was supposed to be a slight shove.

"Don't worry I'm just messing with you Iwa-chan."
Hajime nodded but the feelings didn't disappear and the urge to cry didn't either.