Savior

Disaster

Support fucking sucked. The entire time we just talked about what made us sad and what we thought we could do about it. It's like, if we knew what we could do about it, wouldn't we already have done it. I really didn't pay attention to anyones story. Well, anyone except Damien. I was entranced in his story. Here's how it went down.

"Well, I'm Damien. I recently moved here from Scotland. The reason behind that is because i'm sick. I have bone cancer. The Royal London Hospital is where my parents want me to go to there for advanced treatment. I have gotten very depressed from this sickness. It's a side affect from treatment. My parents are very big on support groups. I am in 3 right now. This one, a cancer one, and a boys only one. The boys only one is to share my sexual needs with other boys who can'relate yet not be able to express them with real females. We have quite the bodning sessions there, talking about porn and shit. I am also depressed because i have ruined my parents lives. They whole world is focused on me. I have taken over their every thought. I don't want this. I want to die already so my parents and my sisters can be free of me. Oh yea, and i like to slit my fucking wrists. Just like the rest of you cunts." And with that, he stormed out of the room. I spent the rest of the hour long session thinking about him. Stacy had just simply went on talking to everyone. Only a few kids actually said anything really personal. I wasn't one. 

I was outside waiting for my mum to come and pick me up. I got a text that read, "Gonna be about 20 minutes late sweetie. Bad traffic" Awesome mum, now i can freeze out here in the London cold.

i got a text from Harry saying, "So can we meet tonight? I wanna take you somewhere special." I replied quickly, "Of course, can't wait!"

"Hey" I heard someone say in a scottish accent. Damien. "I was sitting next to you. What's your name?"

"Umm… Autumn."

"Nice name ya got there. Sorry about the cunt comment in there, I'm sure you're not a cunt."

I giggled a bit a that. "Thanks. Nice to know I'm not some emo cunt like the rest of those downers."

"Yea, it seemed awfully… depressing in there." He laughed a dark laugh at the ground from his own saddistic joke.

"I wonder why? It's not like it's a room full of sad teens whose parents can't accept their kids are sad and don't need to be around more depressing people."

"Very very true. And that Stacy chick. Now she's a load of bullshit."

"She is. She's even worse than a therapist. Not only does she nod sympathetically at everything you say, but she says, i've been through that too sweetie, its tough. Its like, i doubt you've been through this. You are like little miss sunshine and shit."

"Exactly!"

I paused before saying something else, afraid what i was about to say might trigger something, "So how long have you had.. You know… Cancer?"

"I had it first when i was 10, then it was supposedly gone once i was 12 until last year. Now its been here ever since. Ruining my entire families lives."

"I'm sure you aren't ruining their lives! Disaster always strikes, and this disease is your families disaster. You either get through the disaster or you let it kill you off."

"I just wish it could kill me off."

"Don't say that!!!"

"Are you being a hypocrite right now? Saying don't wish you were dead? Because i'm guessing you have thought the exact same thing."

I just stared at the ground at that.

 "Hey, i'm sorry. I just get heated up sometimes. I forgot to mention the anger management support group i have to go to."

I laughed at that. He was good at changing a mood. But just then my mum pulled up to the  hospital pick up area.

"That's my mum. Wheres your phone? I'll give you my number." And with that, i gave him my number and jumped into the car, not believing that once i had one guy to like another one has to pop into my life.