Yours Truly, Ella

April 23rd, 1942 / Hope

I sat there, watching the clock tick behind the desk. Josef had left to get my daily payment of food, so I didn't have much to do. I set my pen aside and begin acting as if I was playing the piano. My fingers glided across the desk as I imagined the feeling of cold ivory keys pressing against my skin.

I could still hear the music in my head as I pretend to play. My favorite piece to play had always been Liebesträume. I had become lost in the thought of the music as I realized that it was the one thing that was keeping me going anymore. The thought of being able to play the piano again gave me hope and comfort.

The door began to open from behind me so I quickly grabbed my pen and looked down at the paper. "I got your payment," Josef said coldly. He dropped it beside me on the desk, "You can leave now." I nodded quickly as I stood up, "Thank you." I grabbed the food wrapped in a scarf off the desk and quickly made my way to the door. He suddenly spoke, resulting in the hairs on my arms to raise, "Wait." I turned around and looked back at him as he motioned at the door, "Close that door." I stood frozen for a moment before hesitantly closing the door and sitting back down, "Has there been an issue with my work?" He shook his head, "No, I've just been thinking." He must have seen me playing the piano, or he's going to fire me. What am I going to possibly do if he fires me? How will I feed Irena and everyone else?

Josef pushed himself up from his seat, crouching down beside me as he stared intently at my face.

He cleared his throat, "I want to try and be nicer to you. I realize that.." He took his hat off and wiped his head, "God, I can't believe I'm saying this. I realized you were human, and you are just like how you were all those years ago. I want to help you, but it's difficult. Do you understand that place I am in?"

I hesitantly nodded as he continued to speak, "I have to save face. Whenever we're in private, will I treat you like shit like I used to? No, but if it's in public, I am doing what makes sure I keep my job. Do you understand?" I nodded as he replied, "Great, you can leave now." I stood up and grabbed the scarf full of goods out of the building. Nice to me? Maybe he was the same. I was unsure if he was drunk or something of the sort because for once he truly seemed normal again.

As I made my way down the street, I passed by an area where a few laborers were patching up the hole in the wall. I stood there for a moment, staring. Every time I blinked I still saw my mother's glossy eyes as the bullet wound bled in her forehead. There was nothing I could do about it now, so I just quickly continued walking home. I felt bad for trying to move on about my mother's death.

I just have to be strong for my father and sister or none of us survive. If I am strong and that means my sister survives then I'll do whatever it takes.

I continued making my way down the streets before I reached our apartment complex. I made my way up the stairwell and opened the door to my apartment after walking down the long hallway. As I opened the door, I saw Frída, Irena, and Flóra all discussing with each other in the corner of the room.

"Welcome back!" came from the kitchen. Maria was standing there, smiling. Her fiance worked at a factory nearby making textiles. "What'd you bring back this time?" I shrugged, "I don't know. I didn't really talk to him when I left."

Maria sighed, "You know you have to try at least acting like you respect him. You're lucky he even gives you food as payment." I sighed, "I know." Placing the scarf on the counter, Maria un-wrapped it and smiled with surprise. "My Gosh! I haven't seen eggs in ages!" I looked over at her in shock, "Eggs?!" Eggs seemed like something you'd find in faraway lands that cost more than gold by the way we were so excited about it. It was only 3 eggs, but that was enough to make everyone in the apartment at that moment ecstatic.

This had lightened everyone's day, as usual, I would get a few pieces of bread or potato or two due to rationing. I walked over to Irena and her friends before sitting down to create a circle with them. "What have you guys been talking about while I was gone?" Frída snickered, "Helena's older brother, Salomon." I looked at them, confused for a moment. "Salomon? He's almost 21, isn't he?" Irena shrugged, "Doesn't mean he's not an option for you."

I snickered with them at her comment, "I don't have time to do that stuff right now anyways. I'm too busy." I stood up from the ground and walked over to the balcony where Leo was sitting. "Afternoon." I stood in the doorway and smiled, sitting down beside him. We've been dating in secret for a few weeks now. We chose to keep it secret just because there are so many people in the apartment.

Having someone to know is always going to be there for you is the main reason we began dating. It was for the sense of comfort. I felt like for once I finally had someone who cared about me and what I needed as a person. I finally felt loved by someone other than my parents. I finally had hope. I wasn't sure I loved him though.