TEMPORARY

a f t e r ma t h

"How do you feel?"

It was currently 11h00, which meant that I had not slept for long when Ava entered our dorm room. She looked like she had been through a... lot, but who was I to judge. I was sure I looked miserable even after the 20-minute shower that consisted of me leaning against the wall for support.

"I feel... something," I said biting into my green apple. The only thing I seemed to be able to eat after a night of mixing drinks.

"Wow that's very insightful," she said while grabbing a change of clothes from her dresser.

"Where did you spend the night? I don't remember getting here and when I woke up you weren't here either"

"What do you mean you don't remember" She stopped in her tracks while looking at me with a suspicious look on her face.

I was confused by her reaction since the last thing I recalled was getting into a car with someone and even before that, things were extremely hazy. I stopped scrolling on my phone and looked at her mid-chew

"I remember the bathroom... I also remember us dancing for a while?" I tried to force myself to remember with no success. I did not typically forget things unless there was a different type of alcohol mixing in the equation, but there was and a lot. Something that my stomach regretted.

"Nothing else?" Ava walked in my direction and pushed the chair in front of me sitting down.

"What do you mean 'nothing else' this is literally all that I remember, did something else happen?"

"So you do not remember you and... Gabriel?" wait a minute Gabriel? The confusion must have shown on my face because not only did I not remember but also I could not see anything happen between me and someone who only acknowledged my existence when he had to. "You were dancing with us and then you just left and when Emma and I looked you were getting pretty familiar with him"

It felt like a bucket of cold water fell on top of my head, when some fragments of what happened the previous night hit me in full force. I did not remember the exact details but I knew that there was a high possibility that I might have tried to dance with him and that thought alone made me cringe. Why would I even do that, and who allowed me to touch alcohol.

Ava after observing my realization in silence for a few seconds got up and walked to the bathroom smiling as if she just had delivered the best news ever.

❊ ❊ ❊

I could no longer hide in my room when Monday arrived. I could skip class, or just prepare something to eat on our kitchenette, but I told myself that it had been a day and no one probably remembered Beck's party.

Yes, that was rather naïve on my part because as soon and I sat down at our usual table Asher said

"Iris, where did you and Gabriel disappear to last Saturday" he wiggled his eyebrows and had his usual smirk signaling that he just wanted a reaction from me, and he got a reaction alright. I almost spit the matcha and vanilla latte that was already inside my mouth and I immediately looked at Gabriel, who, once again looked like he had somewhere much more interesting to be.

"Asher don't do that, she's embarrassed" Emma tried to help me out but pointing the obvious now would not help. Nothing would be able to cure my embarrassment. This is a moment that I will forever remember randomly throughout the day and cringe to the extreme.

"Don't do what I was just making sure I saw it correctly"

"No you're right dude I saw it too," I thought of Lucas as a friend but clearly, I was wrong.