Remembering to Forget

8

A week has passed since the match.

Dominic dutifully files the books, with a smile on his face. He doesn't necessarily enjoy mundane work, but it is certainly a nice change from the hectic nature of everything else around him. He's got a lunch break coming up soon; he'll try and get some writing done.

He has barely spoken to Julianne or Alyssa in the last week.

Not that he doesn't want to, or anything. He's not really sure what he wants. But for some reason, the thought of reaching out to them just feels wrong. If he thinks about contacting them, whether during school or the weekend, a pit falls in his stomach, and only vanishes once he's distracted elsewhere. For example, work.

Besides, he's sure they'd rather be doing other things with their time, anyway. They both seemed like they'd have enough friends.

Except Julianne said that you were the first person that she'd opened up to about her issues. What does that mean?

And the pit of uncertainty returns. Dominic recalls the conversation he had with Steven about his sister; how he said she was the only one he felt comfortable around, that he could talk to. But even that was out of necessity, to keep Missy occupied, so she didn't lose her mind trying to deal with everything.

Why is it so hard to reach out?

"Dominic?"

Dominic's breath hitches, as he recognises James' voice. The boy who he treated to pizza and immediately ghosted for two weeks afterwards. He probably isn't going to be very happy to see Dominic here.

"Nice to see you again." Dominic still hasn't turned, still hasn't worked up the courage to look at James' face, but there's no hint of malice in the boy's voice. "I was worried about you."

He was what?

"Uh... Hey, James."

"Do you have a couple of minutes?"

"I can take my lunch break now, if you would like."

The two of them head to a quiet café across the road from the library. Dominic shifts in his seat opposite James, a barrage of questions thumping the inside of his skull, one after the other. "So... why did you come over?"

"I'm not allowed to read?" James smiles, speaking teasingly, and takes a sip of the coffee in front of him. "Didn't know you worked there."

"Yeah, my boss is really nice. Apparently the last woman left without much warning, and I was in the right place at the right time. Got lucky."

"Right, right." Another sip from James. Dominic shifts in his seat, feeling a terrible itch along the sides of his ribs. "Listen—"

"I'm sorry." Dominic interrupts James, because time and time again he's failed to get out what he wanted to, what he needed to, and he'll be damned if he lets another person think he's trying to hurt them. "For, uh, ignoring you, I guess. I thought maybe you wouldn't be as bad off if you weren't seen hanging around me. Social outcast and all."

"Outcast? Aren't you friends with one of the most social people in the entire school?" James folds his arms, not accepting the excuse that Dominic gives him. And if he thinks about it, it is an excuse, because he hasn't been alone for a while now. He's just so used to the feeling of not having anyone to rely on that it's hard to adjust his mindset. "Although, I guess I've never seen you with anyone else, so maybe I'm..."

"No, you're right. Just my victimhood complex acting up."

"Well, I appreciate the thought, anyway. But I'm fine, I promise you. You don't have to avoid me." James speaks carefully, assertively, and Dominic has dealt enough with Missy to know when someone's hiding the truth. "But anyway, how have you been?"