I'm Sorry///// Short Story

I Told You It Was Short

By the age of 11

I knew it was getting bad when I was angry,

I have to get up and do another day.

I didn't want to die but I am tired of doing.

By the age of12

I'm exhausted through the day, yet I'm scared to sleep.

With people around, my chest clenches tighter and tighter,

So, the moment I'm alone I can finally breathe and loose it.

I don't want to get out of bed,

I don't want to brush my teeth,

I don't want to shower,

Or

Do my hair,

By the age of 13

Getting dressed is a chore and eating isn't even a thought.

Lately I find myself so uncomfortable in my own head, I feel claustrophobic .

Kicking and screaming under my skin trying to get out.

I find comfort on the floor,

A light switch on my wall, I wish my brain were off with one flick.

The thoughts are loud and they run,

My outside feels the cracks on my inside.

By the age 14

I physically hurt from the heartache,

Feeling joy is weird and almost uncomfortable.

It's there though but it always fades.

I've become an alcoholic,

It feels so good like it takes my depression away from me.

By the age of 15

The alcohol has stopped working.

I'm taking Anti-depressants and in a mental hospital.

I've committed nearly 6 times in the past month,

I don't know what to do with my life anymore.

I'm thinking of ending it for good now.

By the age of 16

I'm sorry mum dad brothers and sisters that I disappointed you,

This isn't the goodbye I was planning but it will have to do.

I'm sorry for all the pain and worries I've put you through.

I'm sorry for the stress you have been through with me.

I'm sorry but I have to do this.

By the age of 17

I couldn't do it, I could put any more pressure on them,

I've tried for so long to fix this for so long.

I'm trying to get better and I think it's working.

I hope that I can make this world a better place again.

By the age of 18

I've done it I've completed my goal of defeating depression.

I'm sorry once again to my mum dad brothers sisters' grandparents' friends.

Thank you for being there for me and not giving up on me.