It was a hard decision if I should go out with Josh tonight or not. While I was deciding, it got too late to go anywhere so I decided to postpone it for tomorrow. The walk to Josh’s bedroom seemed to take forever and my palms started to sweat, out of a nervous habit. Why am I nervous? I shouldn't be. Just remind yourself of how much of an asshole he is and how much you- oh fuck it. There’s no girl in the world that wouldn't be attracted to a guy like that. He’s actually not a jerk, he’s just trying to be funny. Well he is funny.
The inner war continued, the closer I got to his room the louder my mind got. Won’t you just shut up? Gosh, I sound like a crazy person. Reaching his door, which are closed and probably locked due to having soon to be two younger half siblings, I knocked lightly on them. I’ve always hated the white paint on doors and walls of this house. Since the moment I’ve moved in. Just standing there and staring at the doors made me uneasy.
I heard some noise from the other side and soon enough I could see Josh’s face appear in front of me. His hair was messy, his eyes half closed. He looked like he’s been sleeping. He looks- okay, focus! Umm what was I gonna say? What…oh, right! “What’s up?” His voice is sooo…ugh! Stop! “Can we…” I started but trailed off. Is this what it’s like when you’re extremely sexually attracted to a person you’re not supposed to be? My heart felt like it’s gonna burst out of my chest. I realized after a moment that I was starring at his lips. “...Can we go out tomorrow? I mean, it’s too late now and ummm…” For a moment I thought he was going to kiss me. I kinda wanted to too, but it’s wrong. With our parents getting married. Even though it would be a fake marriage, cause my mom doesn't love or even like Josh’s dad. But this on the other hand… This is different. “Sure. Is that all?” I nodded. It took all of will power I had left not to stop him from closing the damn door and kissing him. But I didn't. And so I walked back into my room.
When I got back to my room, I flopped down on my bed, face down. I felt like screaming. How does he do that to me? It’s like… magic. No one’s ever had this kind of effect on me. Fuck you, Josh Franceschi. I groaned and turned over before taking my phone which so happens to have WiFi on it. I clicked on the little YouTube icon and searched You Me At Six. If I can’t have him I might as well fall asleep while listening to his voice.
I woke up the next morning and I honestly felt worse than yesterday in the morning, even with the hangover. The phone’s still on my bed, thankfully cause I usually kick it off the bed. I took it and turned on one of the songs I seem to like the most: Little Bit Of Truth. Right when the chorus rolled in someone barged into my room. I couldn't see who it was at first, because of the closet that’s blocking my view. “Sooo…all of a sudden you like my band?” I quickly turned off the music which was blasting on full volume though the speaker on my phone. I sat up as he came into my view. “Ummm…” He was smirking, but soon that smirk faded as he looked down at what I was wearing which was practically nothing. Just my underwear. And I kinda didn't mind him checking me out. But if I wanna pretend…I covered my body with a blanket before tossing a stuffed teddy bear that was lying on the floor next to the bed at him. It hit him right in the face and no matter how much I wanted to keep a straight face, I couldn't. I started cracking up and he lifted an eyebrow. “You think this is funny?” He glared at me so I calmed down. “Ummm…it is?” He shook his head. Since when is he such a baby? And why is he so serious? He started walking out of my room. He was already out of view before he came back, picked up the teddy bear and tossed it back at me. But he missed so I started laughing again. He smiled too and left the room.
