Always and Forever

~ 14 ~

This chapter is written by bittersweetlou!!

TW// weight insecurity

The insensitive comments were really starting to upset him.

He was only joking. Harry knew that- but it still hurt. The way Louis would ignorantly compare Harry to someone with an eating disorder, made him sick to his stomach.

That wasn't something to joke about.

He'd tell him if he had the courage. He just didn't was the thing.

He never seemed to lately.

He knew Louis cared, he just took his jokes and teasing too far most of the time. He also knew if he told Louis how he felt, he would probably stop, but Harry felt intimidated by him. Sure, he was his best friend, but he knew all too well what happened when Louis was rubbed the wrong way.

So Harry kept quiet. Louis was his best friend. Louis was all he had. He couldn't lose that.

Harry however, wasn't all Louis had. He'd gotten closer with Zayn and his soccer team.

And Eleanor.

He'd had a crush on a girl named Eleanor from the time he was only 8 years old, and now that they were lab partners in science class- well.

"Harry Harry Harry!" Louis ran down the halls to Harry who was standing at his locker, pulling his coat over his frail arms and carefully putting his backpack on his shoulders.

"Louis Louis Louis" he answered, rolling his eyes a bit.

"I'm glad I caught you before you left! I was wondering if we could hang out next week sometime instead of this weekend?" He asked, it was a Friday and they had planned on spending the weekend together since that hadn't hung out in a while.

"Oh, uh yeah that's fine" Harry smiled, trying to hide how disappointed he actually was.

"Thanks, the team is having a party tonight and Eleanor asked me to go the fair with her... I didn't wanna let her down ya know? I'm new to the whole 'boyfriend' thing" Louis rambled.

"Yeah, yeah I totally get it," Harry supported his best friend no matter what. "Next weekend?"

"Absolutely twiggy" he laughed, nudging Harry a little, before walking off. The nickname that Louis seemed to think was so funny hurt his heart every time he heard it. He couldn't help his weight.

Especially this time.

Eleanor got called baby, cutie, and all those adorable names.

And Harry? He was apparently a fucking twig to Louis.

At least, that's how he saw it.

Sometimes he found himself wishing he was the one being called baby.

It was just, Louis' shoulders, chest and middle were thickening out. His face was more structured, voice starting to deepen, well, not deepen really, it was just becoming a little lower, raspier.

Harry loved it.

Throughout the school year, Harry had found himself unable to keep himself from admiring his best friend.

Harry kept reminding himself nothing would happen between them though, it couldn't. Louis was straight and he had yet to accept that.

What he had accepted though, was his own sexuality.

He was far from straight.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

While Louis' weekend was filled with social activities and time with Eleanor, Harry stayed home, with not much else to do besides watch movies and read.

Really living the dream. He thought bitterly as he finished 'Love Actually' for the second time that weekend.

Yes, he watched it twice. Yes, it was May and not December. He really didn't give a shit though, it was his favorite.

It was one of those movies that no matter how awful he was feeling, could always calm him a little. A movie that brought warm memories. That Christmas feeling, it wasn't the typical Christmas movie. But- to each their own. It just made him feel better. Helped him to forget that his best friend was out having fun without him.

His comfort movie.

"Hey mum?" He mumbled, rubbing his sunken eyes as he sauntered into the kitchen where Anne was stood over a pot of chicken noodle soup.

"Yeah baby? What's up?" She asked, stirring the soup a bit. She always made chicken noodle when Harry felt ill.

Today was one of those days, and Harry found himself glad that he wasn't out doing things with Louis like they'd planned.

He wished he'd come over for movies and cuddles though.

"What are your thoughts on gay rights?" He asked softly, nibbling at a hangnail on his thumb nervously.

"I think they deserve rights just as much as anyone else sweetheart. Love is love, and people deserve to be happy don't you think?" She replied.

He nodded a bit, feeling some weight being lifted off his shoulders.

"Why do you ask?" She looked up from the soup and over at him.

"I'm gay mum." He responded, expecting her to say something, but she was silent.

She just set the ladle down and wrapped her arms around her son tightly.

~ ~ ~ ~~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

It wasn't just Louis' appearance that Harry noticed was beginning to change. It seemed like all the other guys were changing as well.

All the other guys besides Harry that is.

The lack in changes definitely wasn't helping with his bullying situation. He was called all sorts of names, pushed around, and teased.

He'd had enough.

Sure, he hadn't hit puberty yet, but that didn't mean he couldn't pretend. Thus, the past month or so, Harry had been trying to appear as though he had.

He'd been wearing two jackets everyday to try to appear bigger, and he'd been speaking in a lower tone.

It was the last day of school when his act finally came crashing down on him.

He'd stepped into the bathroom to call his mum, and not knowing someone had been in there, was caught using his normal voice.

By the time he left for the day, his knees were bruised from being tripped, his ears numb from trying to tune out all the whispers, and his heart hurting because he'd texted Louis about what happened, and never received an answer.

Louis and Eleanor ditched the last day together, and Harry figured he was too busy with her to respond.

By the end of the night, when his emotional pain had become more of a numbness, he pulled out his phone again.

Still no response.

"Fuck it," he whispered, pulling up his Twitter. He had nothing left to lose, and it's not like anyone would respond anyway.

@ harrystyles: I'm gay.

Sorry I feel like this chapter was super rushed! I spent like a week on it trying to push through writers block- anywayyyy thanks for reading!!(:
-Sunnie