Poll Yourself Together

Poll #15

1) Would you rather have a computer that gives bad dating advice (constantly), of snickers quietly to itself whenever you do something it disapproves of?

The results were pretty even, but most people said bad dating advice.

My answer:  The same I guess, the idea of my computer chuckling quietly to itself is kinda scary.

2) Would you rather have a computer that threatened to publish all your drafts when you kept it unplugged, or that wouldn't let you edit your drafts once you published them?

Most people said "threatened to publish"

My answer:  I agree

3) Would you rather have a computer that gave good life advice, or automatically posted witty and intelligent responses to people's comments?

Most people said "witty and intelligent" answers.

My answer:  I need life advice :/

4) Would you rather have a computer that could fly, or one that had a functional arm attached to it?

Most people said they wanted one with a functional arm.

My answer:  As well you should

5) Would you rather have a pair of sticks or, pair of rocks, or a stick and a rock?

The answers were pretty varied

My answer:  Hmm, a stick and a rock.  I'll go for versatility.

6) You now choose between a 2 ft rope and a tube of super glue, in addition to the items you chose from the last question. What do you do with them?

Most people said rope, although some of the reasons were... concerning.

My answer:  Ima superglue my rock to my stick and make a rock-stick

7) You now choose between a go kart and and a grappling hook and add it to your previous items. What do you do with your arsenal?

Most people said the go kart

My answer:  I get a grappling hook and I swing throughout the suburban neighborhood, landing on people's rooftops and cackling

7) The four computers you selected in your previous answer are attacking you! How do you defeat them using your three items!

Most people said the computers win.  Cowards >:(

My answer:  I heft my rock-stick, grapple my hook, and kick some high definition-screen butt.  Seriously though, what's a computer that gives good life advice going to do to me?  The one with the arm might be kinda concerning though.

Yesterday (ha ha)'s writing challenge, I told you to vote on your favorite story!  And yet, NO ONE VOTED!  So you both win!  Horray!

(grumble)

The writing challenge issues in the last poll, I realized, I would ultimately have to judge myself.  I'll be back in a moment.

I am back now, after reading the three stories submitted.  I thought I was prepared.  I was wrong.

Unfortunately, it's impossible for me to judge which story is better out of three stories that so clearly take place at the same time.  So instead, I will attempt, mistakenly, to organize this... thing.

As I understand it, here is the story so far: *narrator voice*

After the temporary truce between the orange growers and non-orange-growers to defeat the dreaded "Number two", embodiment of standardized testing, the war of the oranges has resumed once again.  Quack, Overdue, Confusion, and Griffin, members of the time-traveling orange police, travel back in time to defeat Pauch and Greg, members of an insidious orange syndicate.  Quack destroys their orange supplies with his orange-o-blaster, accidentally-on-purpose killing Greg in the process.  End credits.

We return for the next episode.  The time-traveling orange police are now tracking down Pauch and Greg's hidden orange stash.  They find a woman on the street, eating an orange, and interrogate her about her crimes.  They discover that Pauch and the possibly-dead Greg are still at large (gasp!).

Quack, private eye and defender of the American way, expresses his doubt that the object they are looking for is really called "the object".  After avoiding some dangerous cloud spies, they arrive at the dreaded taco gong to defeat Pauch and the still-possibly-dead Greg!  They find overdue inside the taco gong, but quickly realize overdue is just there for the food (we respect that).  They then destroy all the oranges in the world.

We cut to Pauch, shocked and horrified at the sudden destruction of her perfectly innocent orange basket.  Pauch swears revenge on Quack and Overdue.  Then, William and Griffin show up.  Griffin has apparently defected from the time-traveling orange police (or is he a spy??), and offers to heal Pauch.

Overdue is aghast at the destruction caused by Quack's crusade against the oranges.  A perfectly innocent taco gong has now ceased to exist forever.  Quack internally monologues about the orange diamond a bit, and then Pauch shows up, covered in orange pulp and blood, swearing to get revenge for Greg's death.  Overdue and Quack immediately kidnap Pauch for no particular reason.  The episode ends.

Key points:

-Juan has not been seen since the defeat of Number Two.

-Greg is, apparently, dead

-I have no idea whose side Griffin is supposed to be on

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WRITING CHALLENGE:  In 2000 characters or less (one comment), choose one of the following:

     A. Write the next installment of the orange chronicles (I will do my best to make each installment work together, if they contradict each other, I will choose one to be considered canon)

     B. If you are not interested in the orange chronicles, convince me why the pizza you constructed in the poll below is the best pizza.

Poll time!!

1) Pineapple on your pizza?

2) Cheese above or below the sauce?

3) Hot or cold pizza?

4) Cheddar or mozzarella?

5) Do you prefer your pizza delivered by helicopter or highly-trained tunneling groundhogs?

6) If you have to pick up your pizza yourself, how do you ensure you aren't spotted by the police?

7) Have you ever been spotted by the police while getting your pizza?  What happened?  How did you escape?

8) If you had to fight your pizza to eat it, would you win?

9) If you had a pizza right now, what would you do with it?

10) If you ran a poll book, what kind of polls would you make? (totally innocent question I swear, no I have plenty of ideas for polls why would you ask)