Hate Me | Eren Yeager

15. The Ghost

Today, you're sitting on the patio again, but this time you're undercover. The rain's returned.

It's not particularly warm or cool amid the humid weather, but it's not like you would notice with your head running amuck with so many thoughts.

You haven't touched your keyboard in ten minutes because words refuse to come to your mind.

Shit. How am I supposed to focus on writing when Eren's coming back?

You grow more and more frustrated by the minute, wanting to continue on with writing the song but there are so many questions you want to ask.

You turn your head at the sound of the doorbell ringing, who's here?

The patter of your feet on the sleek tile seems to echo off the walls, what if... no. Why would anyone tell him where you live?

Hesitantly you grab the door handle, what if it really is him behind the door... are you prepared?

To face the ghost that's been haunting you?

"... Oh. Hey."

Sasha gives you a strange look, "Hey... why do you look so pale? Are you feeling okay?"

You shake your head slowly and step back to let her in, "Uh, yeah. Sorry... it's nothing. What are you doing here?"

"Wow... I actually haven't seen your new condo before. It's pretty nice y/n."

She looks around at the perfect tall white walls and black marble tiles, the vintage tresses along the rim of the ceiling, the open entryway into the living room with a couple plush black couches littered with blankets and pillows and the wide flat screen tv. It was pretty expensive, but you had been saving up for the past two years, you deserve a place like this.

"Thanks, do you want anything to eat?"

"Oo sure, I won't bother you to make anything, I'll just take some reheated leftovers please!"

"Sure, I had dumplings last night. That alright?"

"It's perfect."

As you get out the dumplings and toss them in the microwave, you feel the air growing more stifled, like there's something to be said.

You turn around and notice Sasha twiddling her thumbs nervously.

"So uh... I came here to tell you Niccolo and I are having a party tomorrow and... Eren's invited. Did... Mikasa tell you he's coming back?"

"..."

You're... going to see him at her party tomorrow? It feels too soon, you're not prepared. This whole time you thought you were fine, that you moved on, but you never really did. He's the phantom haunting your dreams, the shiver in your spine on lonely nights, the whisper in your ears when all is silent.

I can never make him disappear...

"... yeah."

"Are... you gonna be okay? You don't look okay."

"I'll be fine. I've moved on."

She stares at you a bit longer like she doesn't believe you. It's obvious you're lying.

You're saved by the beep of the microwave. The plate of dumplings is hot as you take it out and serve it to Sasha, who's never hesitated before eating something like she is now.

"So uh... how is he these days?"

Sasha talks through bites, not covering her mouth, "He's doing good I heard... which I didn't hear much."