Hate Me | Eren Yeager

8. Passion and Pain Taste the Same When I'm Weak

The front door clicks closed behind you as you enter the apartment, the familiar homey scent of vanilla from the various incense randomly scattered about greeting you.

Armin, who is making something in the kitchen to your left, turns to you startled, "Oh, you're already back y/n?"

"Yeah..."

Eren doesn't look to you from the couch, either engrossed in the anime he's watching or too tired to care.

You place your purse down on the counter, looking down at the warm cheesy Italian dish Armin seems to be mixing.

"What are you making Armin?"

"I thought I'd make you guys some tomato basil pasta, you've both been through a lot lately."

"Thank you Armin that's really kind of you, I'm sure it'll taste great."

"No problem." He gives you his usual innocent smile.

You turn around and notice you've finally caught Eren's attention, but he quickly turns back to watching tv.

6:40 p.m

The pasta is savory and rich on your tongue, Eren eating it beside you on the couch. You can't remember the last time you've both simultaneously had dinner, it feels so unfamiliarly domestic.

The air is silent, and your bowl is empty. Now's a good time to ask Eren.

A small bit of anxiety arises in your chest, this is a conversation you really don't want to have. If he says what you don't want to hear, you'll have to leave him. It's the worst possible scenario.

But... do I have to do it now?

You suppose it wouldn't be right to leave Eren to tend to his injuries on his own. You could always wait until he's healed to have the conversation-

No.

Enough waiting and putting it off. Waiting won't do you any good.

"Eren..."

His teal eyes flit to you, you can tell he already knows what you're going to ask.

You swallow the quiver in your voice, "... I know now might not be the best time. But I need to know."

Your chest is heavy as you sigh, turning towards him and finally facing your conflict, "You have to choose. Me or Zeke?"

He blinks slowly, turning to look down at his lap, contemplation written in the lines of his face.

"I..."

He sighs and furrows his brows, oh no.

"I don't... I don't know y/n. This really isn't the best time-"

"Why?"

"Well... I just got in a car crash and my rib is broken, it's not really the first thing on my mind."

You know, how could you not. But you have to stifle any bit of sympathy and guilt in this moment. You've prioritized him for too long, you're doing this for you. It's tearing you up inside.

"I... I know. And I'm sorry, but I need to hear your answer. You need to choose if you're gonna keep working for Zeke, or if you're going to quit that life and... make me happy for once."

It seems to have gotten through to him as he stares at you with lips parted, indecisive.

Please... tell me what I want to hear. Even if you have to lie.

He looks from side to side, visibly stuck on an answer.

No... no no no...

"I... it's just that after the medical bills and the car getting totaled, there's a lot of expenses. And I'm taking time off work because of my injuries. But I... can't tell you right n-"