"Can- Can you fix me...Please?" "You don't need fixing, you were never broken in the first place." Or the one where a game of 21 questions sparks a lot more troubles.
Song for this chapter: It's Not The Same Anymore - Rex Orange County
"I can't keep wishing things will be different"
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Luke walked up to Sarah's doorstep; she'd given him the address that morning. He knocked on the door and waited. He heard a voice from inside.
"Who is it?"
That did not sound like Sarah.
"Uh... It's Luke... Hemmings."
The door opened.
Oh no- that's not Sarah. Fuck fuck fuck-
"Oh um, I think I'm at the wrong house, sorry." He took a deep breath, "Do you happen to know where someone called Sarah lives? I'm pretty sure it's around here."
The person laughed, and looked back inside the house. "Sarah! Are you expecting a 'Luke'?"
"Yes!" a voice called from inside the house, followed by the sound of footsteps down the stairs.
"Well then, I guess you are at the right place... I'm Ella," She smiled.
"Hey Luke!" Sarah appeared from behind the other girl, "I'm guessing you already met Ella, my girlfriend."
"Nice meeting you, Ella" Luke smiled awkwardly, and followed them inside the house.
"As you can see," Sarah began, signaling at the pile of boxes in the corner of the living room, "We're still unpacking. I just finished cleaning and organizing my room, so we can just go there I guess." She laughed.
Luke followed her upstairs.
Okay so you don't have to worry about her making a move on you, she's already dating someone. I'm so stupid. Why did I even think that she liked me in the first place? No one does. At least, not anyone who actually cares about me.
"I like the curtains."
"What?"
"The curtains, they're blue, that's my favourite colour."
"Oh, thanks."
They walked down the hall and into the guest bedroom that was currently serving as a makeshift living room. The space was pretty empty with the exception of two bean bags on the floor, and a tv propped atop a cardboard box.
"The furniture is getting here tomorrow" Sarah laughed.
They sat down. This entire meeting seemed forced, like they were both trying to be someone they're not at the hope of preventing any form of embarrassment... or judgement.
"So..." Sarah looked at the ceiling, "Anything interesting happened recently?"
"Not really." Luke replied.
"I'm not really good at the whole talking to people thing, so sorry about that." She said.
"Oh, no, it's okay, you don't need to apologize. I suck at that too."
They both laughed. Genuinely, this time.
"Not to turn this into a middle school sleepover or anything," The girl began, "but I think it would be fun if we played 21 questions-'
Luke almost jumped. It was happening all over again. Before he could say anything memories flashed through his head, the good, the bad, and especially the ones he wished he'd never had.
He hadn't even heard what Sarah said after that sentence. He couldn't; it was as if his body was frozen and the only part of him still alive was his brain which was trapped in an endless, torturous cycle of thought.
"Luke? Luke?! Oh my god, are you crying?"
Great job, Luke you've done it again. When are you going to stop being a burden to every single person you meet?
"I'm so sorry... Was it something I said?"
He tried to speak, but no words came out.
"Do you want a hug?" Sarah asked not knowing what else to do.
Luke nodded.
It was a strange feeling, but he felt safe in her arms. It was almost like having a big sister there for him.
"Hey," Sarah said as she pulled away from the hug, "I know last time you said you'd rather not talk about it, and I don't want you to feel pressured to do so, but could you at least let me know what I said that upset you?"
He wanted to tell her everything. How a stupid game caused all of it, and how he lost his best friend... But Luke knew that once he started talking, there was no stopping.
He had to do it regardless. After all, Sarah was his friend, and friends tell each other everything, right?
"I fucked up" He mumbled under his breath, "I should've never invited him to my house that day, and we never should've played that stupid game."
The girl nodded to let him know she was listening.
"It's not the same anymore," Tears welled up behind his eyes again, "He's there, but it feels like I've lost him...."
Sarah put her hand reassuringly on Luke's shoulder. "Don't worry about it, everything's going to be fine."
He cupped his own face in his hands, "But it won't! I don't know if I should even care about him. He's been my friend for so long and I ruined everything. I messed up. It's all my fault. I just want to be happy with myself and my life, but I- I just can't. And it sucks because I'm trying so hard, I really am, but everyone just tells me to try harder. My best is never enough-" He was interrupted by his own sobs.
"I can't speak for anyone else, Luke, but you'll always be enough for me. I know we haven't really talked much- Hell! I met you two days ago! But whenever you're with me, I don't want you to feel like you have to be someone else. You've always been, and you always will be enough."
They heard Ella's voice coming from downstairs, "Sarah! That Nicole girl from the coffee shop is calling you!"
"Tell her I'm busy!" She shouted back.
Luke laughed, tears still gleaming against his skin, "Who's that?"
"Agh don't worry about her, she's just some annoying girl I met."
They both chuckled.
Sarah seemed to remember something that caused her to roll her eyes, "Oh and she still owes me a pack of gum."
Luke laughed again.
"Seriously! I swear, It's like she's addicted to that shit!"
***
Michael looked at his phone,
He had two missed calls and three text messages.
Cal: Are you coming to the studio today?
Cal: We need to talk.
Cal: Answer your phone!!
"I'm sorry..." Michael whispered to himself, turning off his phone and silencing it.
He'd spent the whole day contemplating how he was going to make things how they used to be, but deep down, he knew it would never be the same.
A/N
Okay besties!! So I know an apology is due for the emotional damage, but oh well <3 Did you like the Nicoke slander? My name on insta isn't "nicoke hate acc" for nothing :) Chapter dedicated to bestie Ella. Also, I feel like the whole gc is somehow gonna end showing up in the story lmao. See u next time besties, I love y'all <3
