The City Lake

VII

Caleb was happy that Jeremy was happy to see him. His friend greeted him at the door with a broad smile matching his broad shoulders. Caleb could only grin in return, rather stupidly, to his slight embarrassment. The heat he felt wasn't only from embarrassment, though. Jeremy's new shirt fit him well.

"Come in, come in!" Jade called from further inside. She had a smile of her own on her face, although it was strained in false cheer as if she didn't want anyone to see the pain she felt.

"Hello," Caleb said to her, giving her a nod as he stepped into the living room. William was playing a game on the television, Jade was sitting beside him on the couch, and Jeremy's grandfather—the original Jeremy, whom Caleb had agreed to call Jay to avoid confusion—sat in an armchair off to the side, watching the game with not much interest. Jay had his own place a little ways away but it wasn't unusual he would stop by. As grumpy as he seemed sometimes, Caleb suspected he enjoyed the company of his family.

Jeremy sat on the end of the couch, taking up the last spot to sit in. For the last while, there was an unspoken agreement that no one sat in the second armchair, as it had been used mainly by Jeremy's father. Instead, Caleb perched himself on the arm of the couch by Jeremy's side, though the arm was low enough that it felt like he was slipping onto Jeremy's lap, not that Jeremy minded. In fact, his friend kept him steady by wrapping an arm around his waist, holding Caleb in place. Jay watched them with narrowed eyes but didn't say anything. He only looked thoughtful and changed his position so that he was further relaxed into his armchair.

"Caleb," said Jade after a few comfortable minutes of quiet, the only sound in the room being William's games. "Would you mind helping me for a moment?"

"Of course," Caleb immediately replied. He stopped to wonder if he was being too easy going and should've said no, but then he pushed those thoughts away. These people had become his family now and he'd do anything for them because he loved them, not because he was forced to or guilted into it.

He followed Jade into her bedroom and waited for instructions. She closed the door behind them and shuffled into her closet.

"I have some old clothes from Jeremy's father, and well, the boys didn't want them, so if you want something before I donate them, then take what you want," she said. Her eyes held sadness that she had to do this task while the rest of her face attempted to stay neutral.

Caleb paused. He could use new clothes, yes, but from his friend's dead father? From a man who had been becoming like his father? Perhaps he was a little sentimental. It wouldn't hurt to take some clothes in case he needed them, and then he'd have a piece of that man to remember him by. He nodded to indicate he accepted the offer.

Jade pursed her lips. "Alright, then. I've got to sort through some dresses to see if I want to give any of them away."

They worked without speaking for about ten minutes until Caleb found a shirt he liked but wasn't sure would fit because it looked like it would be tight. He'd have to try it on to see for sure, though Jade was here. She noticed his deliberation, and said: "I can step out for a moment, check up on the boys."

"Thank you," he replied. Quickly slipping out of his shirt, he pulled the other shirt on to test. It fit, so he took it off and folded it up for the 'keep' pile. There was a pair of pants he was curious about too, so he tried them on as he took advantage of Jade's absence. Deciding to keep the pants too, he folded them up while he was still in his underwear and placed them on the right pile.

Logically, it should have been at this point Caleb put his clothes back on. However, his eye caught on a fabric in Jade's 'give away' pile. It was a pleasant color between pink and purple, and seemed soft. He picked up the dress and let it unfold into its shape, not unlike a sundress. He felt compelled to put it on, just to see what it was like to have a skirt instead of pants.

Slipping in was the easy part. He just had to step in with both feet and then pull it up. The difficult part was when his hands struggled with the zipper at the back, refusing to smoothly go all the way up at once with his arms twisted at a weird angle behind himself. Eventually he got it, and he stood by the bed, not feeling any different. The skirt ended just above his knees and swished lightly as he moved his torso from side-to-side.

The chest area slumped without anything to fill it, and Caleb realized he didn't want anything to fill it. Not that body type had anything to do with gender, as Noah had taught him, but it was often a sign, he had heard. He preferred the one he had. And despite not knowing what being a girl felt like inside, he somehow understood with perfect clarity that he was a guy. A guy who didn't mind dresses, apparently. Caleb continued moving his torso, entranced with the swishing and how free his legs felt.

He froze when the door opened behind him. Wouldn't Jade have knocked since she knew he was changing his clothes? But it wasn't Jade. It was Jeremy, and he stood there in shock for one terrible moment where Caleb wondered if this would make things weird between them.

Then Jeremy raised an eyebrow, walked forwards, and took Caleb's hand to twirl him properly. The skirt flew out all around him and that was even more fun.

"I think you wear it better," announced Jeremy, completely non-judgemental.

He stopped spinning Caleb, which caused Caleb to falter in his step and fall backwards onto the bed, legs draped over the end of it. Jeremy grabbed his knees and helped him scramble all the way up. Caleb bent his knees, letting the skirt portion fall down towards his waist. How Jeremy was standing there, hands now sitting on top of Caleb's knees, gave him an easy entrance to climb on top and have his way with Caleb if he chose, but his hands never wandered down and there wasn't a heat in his eyes.

Instead, Jeremy flopped down beside Caleb on the bed, lying on his side to face his friend. "I like you no matter who you are," he said, very seriously.

"I'm a guy," Caleb said, unsure why he felt it necessary to blurt that out so fast, though it came with relief in his mind and tone. He was tired of the back and forth wondering his mind had done, and now that it was cleared up, he felt much lighter. "Who likes girl things."

"Not girl things," Jeremy corrects. "Cal things. I like that you're different."

Caleb rushed forward into a tight hug, catching Jeremy by surprise, though he returned the hug just as strong within a few seconds. Being accepted for who he was felt so good.

"Aren't you going to say it back?" Jeremy asked into Caleb's ear.

"If I say 'I like that you're different,' then I act like you, and then I'm not so different," Caleb replied, savoring the hug. Jeremy laughed and pulled him closer as he naturally clenched up.

"We'll be different together."

Caleb grinned. "I'd like that."