✨Angst✨

1

TW: Severe loneliness/ Suicide attempt   

Evan was on the ground, eyes beginning to hurt as he stared up at the sun. 

All he felt was pain. 

Evan distantly looked on, watching the day pass by as he waited for someone to come get him. To tell him it would be okay and that the world would get better and that he would get better and there was actually someone on this fucking planet who found it in them to love him. 

But no one came. 

Evan was left with his thoughts, he was left to replay the events in his head. 

The movement of one foot after another as he climbed, the momentary hope that rushed through him, the snapping of the branch, the feeling of his hands releasing their grip on the rough bark of the tree and finally...the fall. 

Right after Evan had let go of the branch, for a brief, seemingly endless moment he was falling through the air. He felt weightless, though his body rushing him towards the ground was proving him to be anything but. Evan remembered trying to catch a glimpse of the shining sun, something good to take with him as he left. One last attempt to prove to himself the world wasn't total shit. 

And even as he hit the ground, his arm going numb and his head spinning, Evan still couldn't escape his loneliness. 

His mother was at work, with no intention of calling, he was sure. He didn't have any friends besides Jared, who Evan was almost certain wouldn't pick up. Evan didn't want to bother anyone anyway, which was such a stupid thought as he was laying there on the ground, broken arm and a concussion and tears streaming down his face. But it was a thought that couldn't be helped. It was an instinct. So, he was left alone. 

Fully and truly alone. 

(I don't know if I should feel bad that I feel better after writing that but I really don't know what else to do so I've resorted to angst)