Passing || Jean Kirstein

Finally Free

❦

(Listen to sad music while you read!)

-i recommend the song at the top, but any sad song is fine:)

Chapter 139 spoilers!

Jean hesitantly opened his eyes, unaware of what he would see. He expected disaster, destruction, and the remnants of whatever was left of the world.

Instead, Jean found himself standing on a brownish rooftop somewhere back home, in the Shiganshina District. The sun shone harshly on his skin and almost instantly, he realized where he was. Standing on the rooftop where he held you for the last time, the same sorrowful feeling he felt that day returned. The world was empty and quiet, the only thing out of place being the blood stain where your body once laid.

"I can't bring her here for you, that's not how this works."

Jean turned around as he recognized the familiar voice, "Eren, what the fuck are we doing here?"

"She misses you, you know? She watches over you everyday." Eren cautiously approached Jean, aware of the how the man was most likely feeling

"Stop fucking talking about her... you don't get to do that," Jean failed to hold back his tears, the world he lived in was quite literally ending and the sudden memory of your death, it was all just too much for him.

Eren embraced him tightly as Jean just stood there, finally letting it all out. Eren explained everything to him, his plan from the beginning, the story of Ymir, Mikasa's crucial decision, everything.

Jean looked in Eren's green eyes one last time, the world around them slowly faded away, "Goodbye horseface."

Gasping, Jean woke up to the mix of a familiar ringing in his ears and commotion around him. The memory of what had just occurred with Eren, unexpectedly hit him.

"Now I remember... You conscientious piece of shit..."

With much struggle, Jean and Connie approached each other, everyone around them desperate to find their loved ones. Jean couldn't help but feel slightly disappointed. Before, he was at peace, finally ready to accept his demise, then suddenly he was back, forced to live in this cruel world once again. At Least if he was a mindless titan, he wouldn't feel the constant pain of missing you. The world around him was filled with bleak reminders of your existence and despite the many years it had been since he'd last seen you, the pain never faltered.

Jean and Connie's eyes widened as they gazed into the distance. Saluting in a cloud of smoke, stood you and Sasha, the brightest smile residing on both of your faces. The sight in front of the men was ethereal, the small glimpse they had turned into a delicate memory that would be cherished forever.

Instantly, Jean had run your way, desperate to hold you one last time. However, the world never seemed to be working in his favor; the instant he had reached your angelic figure, his arms were ready to grasp you, but you weren't standing there anymore, the smoke being his only reminder of your momentary existence.

Three years later

Jean once again stood alone in the Shiganshina District, this time by the base of a tree and the grave that resided permanently next to it. Looking at the grave one last time, he whispered, "You suicidal maniac... Thank you."

His arm reached up and grasped the pendant hanging loosely around his neck. Jean unclasped the necklace, your necklace, and tightly held it. Bringing it up to his lips, he lightly kissed it in his right hand, the hand that once held Marco's ashes, and now the hand that held his last memory of you.

Jean slowly crouched down and began to dig up a small area next to Eren's grave. Bitter tears rolled down Jean's cheeks, he wanted to do this, he needed too, but he wasn't ready to let go. Even now, after seven years, everyday felt the same, a hole left in his heart that you had once filled.

After minutes, he placed your necklace in the dirt and cautiously covered it. During these moments, the closest thing you would get to a burial, Jean spoke his final words to you.

"Goodbye, my love."

After a few moments, Mikasa walked up to the man standing by the tree. She let him reminisce in the bittersweet feeling of finally letting go before she broke the dreary silence, "They are finally at peace."

Jean turned towards her and chuckled, "Yeah, they sure as hell deserve it."

They both laughed as the tears fell and Mikasa smiled one last time, "come on, the others are waiting for us."

The torture of loosing a lover lingers between the two of them as they walk through the field together, and it would for a long time, but atleast they weren't alone anymore.

⚘

Two white birds sat on a tree in the distance, watching the two heart broken soldiers saunter away. They blissfully flew in the opposite direction, finally letting go of the people they had once dedicated their life to, because now they knew, their past lovers would eventually be okay.

◜And with that, they were finally free◞

🅃🄷🄴 🄴🄽🄳