Spark || March 2022

o n e

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" I T' S  A  C A T C H, O U T. Lovely delivery by James, shortish ball bowled into the pitch, Theodore Hastings compulsively pulls and gets no timing whatsoever, Hastings departs for 3 in 8 balls, Here goes the first wicket of Spring waves. If this continues, it is going to be a danger for three times winning champions."

Disappointment. That's what I felt like. Moreover, I am a disappointment. Seeing myself on this television, with more than 7 million people watching, I failed again; I let down my captain, as well as the team coach. Feels so nice to be a disappointment.

I saw myself on the TV again; the most basic thing taught in cricket was to hit the ball with force when you want it to go for a six, or else, give light pressure, but I did the total opposite, and guess what? Here I am, being a disappointment.

Three matches. This is the third match, and I have made the same mistake again. Will I get another chance? Will I be dropped out of the team?

"That's a beautiful six by, Jackson; looks like spring waves are back to action; it would be preferable if players like these came in the top so that it would be easy for scoring runs, isn't it?" I heard the commentary.

Nothing will happen, you will be criticized, but you have to overcome all the criticism and prove yourself. One of the keys, basic things taught when you enter into the public world is to handle criticism, which is something I'm very bad at. It is said that you're not allowed to let what others think into your mind, and that's what I do all the time.

The next few hours go by me watching other cricketers hit sixes, fours, score single runs, double runs, as well a few wickets.

It was as clear as it. Spring waves won by nine wickets. It could have been ten if I didn't get out, or maybe if the captain didn't send me out. Well, I'm a failure. And that's pretty much clear.

Shaking my head, I stood up, going along with the teammates to shake hands with the opponent. Don't feel down, don't feel down. Keep up, be strong, make yourself strong. Exhibit yourself strong, no matter what happens.

Soon, the post-match presentation got over, and all of us were set to leave for our hotel.

"Please board the bus; it has been parked in gate 1; make sure you take all your things and do not leave anything."

I packed my things and waited with the teammates, who were either talking to somebody on their phones or were playing games, and some were talking.

"How are you feeling?" I heard someone ask behind me. Realizing that somebody was asking me only, I turned to see Zach, the captain of Spring waves, and the person who has constant faith in me.

"Cap—?" I asked back, did he ask me something?

"I asked, how are you feeling?" Is it sarcasm? No—why would he speak with sarcasm? The genuinity was seen in his face. My face automatically turned into a frustrated look, and then I had to bring it down because I didn't want the captain to know about it. Looks like it's too late.

He smiled at my reaction— and then patted my back and said, "Don't let people make you block out the real you." And then he left.

Real me? This is me, isn't it? Me, I, my me. Me only, right? I think I know what he means, and I wish I could exhibit it. 

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