chapter 10

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Kurumi pov.

Feeling Y/N's arms around me as I cried for my dead cat felt nice, calming.

"Hey... how about we go to our special place?" She asked in a sweet voice. I nodded into her torso. (I don't wanna say chest cuz Y/N is a TALL bitch.)

_____time skip_____

She sat down with me sitting in her lap "Hey... Y/N? What's your relationship with Miku?" I asked silently as i looked up at her, she looked up to the sky as one of her hands rested on my head, the other on the back of my shoulder. "Well, friends i guess. I don't really know that much about her, so i dont really know. Acquaintances seems like a better word." She answered.

I smiled a bit, but that quickly faded. "Then... why didn't you tell her about our relationship?" I asked, feeling like she was hiding something. "Well, i don't want her to think that I sleep around. 'Cuz then whats the point on trying to get her to not do that?" She looked down at me and smiled. "Why? Did you get jealous?" She teased as she raised an eyebrow, releasing her grip on me. "So what if I did?... I realised how much you mean to me under that month where you were just gone.." i looked down, she is my closest friend... I don't really have any other friends beside her. And I really like her. "Kurumi..." she pulled me back into a hug.

(Soft angsty kurumi headcanons? yes. Also, slight spoilers cuz I'm gonna talk about Kurumi's backstory a bit-)

Tears started to run down my cheeks. "Y-you're my best friend... I don't want to lose you too..."

"Kurumi..."

"I just... its my fault she's gone... and I don't want that to happen again.. please Y/N.." she moved one of her hands to pet my head. "Shhh, it's going to be alright, I'm still here."

"... you might still be here now... but what if something happens in the future... and you know how much you mean to me."

"I know, I know."

"What if I kill you like I did with-"

"You won't. Stop talking that nonsense."

"But-"

"No. Listen Kurumi, I know you lost Sawa. And it's horrible. I know you want to go back and change that, but please, remember that you wouldn't be here in my arms if that never happened, we would've never met if that had happened. I wouldn't be alive if that hadn't happened. I know that it's selfish of me, but kurumi you are my best friend and I don't want to lose you." She kisses my forehead and rested her shin on the crown of my head.

I looked up at her. Even if she meant to cheer me up, those words still hurt. "Yeah... you're best friend..." I murmured out to myself. That's all I'll ever be to her. A best friend.. I burst into tears and nuzzled into her chest. Even if it's only for today, let me be selfish too... let me feel like you actually love me the way I do you. She held me in a tight embrace as I cried into her chest.

It's not fair.. we've been.. well more than friends for so long, and yet she would still choose someone else she just met her few days ago instead of me. I couldn't help but hate her for that. And yet I still wanted to be loved by her and looked at the same way as she does to Miku.

"... its not fair..." I whispered out. "What was that?" She asked in a low and soothing voice, making me grit my teeth and repeat myself, louder and more aggressive than intended. "I said Its Not Fair!" The look on her face was one of pure shock. "Why choose Miku over me?! Am I really just a friend to you?! A fuck buddy?! Someone for you to trade info with and then throw away?! Y/N, I love you... and it hurts so much, sometimes I wished we never met. You would've just been another meaningless life taken in this cruel world... if that meant I wouldn't have felt this pain.. this heartbreak of you choosing someone else over the person you've spent so many wonderful nights with..." realising what I just vented out, I got up to leave, and she didn't even stop me. I felt how some of my hair was wet from her tears, forming a small damp spot on the crown of my head. That was all the clarification I needed to have to know that she was crying. I dared not to look back at her as I walked away.

Y/N's pov

As kurumi walked away, I tried so hard to process what she had just said. She... loves me? Since when? She's always been the one who- does she really think I just see her as a toy to release all my sexual fantasies on? It was only when she had finally left that my thoughts had become dangerously suffocating. Of course I love her... have I really broken her heart? May-.. maybe I should just be lost again... nobody would be able to be hurt if I disappeared right? It would most definitely be better in kurumi's mental state... I shouldn't have said that... I shouldn't have called her my best friend... I never do that when it's just the two of us! Y/N! WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU?! Of course you would only make her more sad when trying to cheer her up... I should've just kept quiet and let her vent... stupid, stupid, stupid, STUPID! Gah! How dumb can you be?! Y/N! Of course I love you too kurumi... but I never thought that you would like be mack so I moved on! Even with those nights! I thought you just wanted to forget the horrors of your life every now and again! I'm so stupid... I'm so sorry, kurumi...

Kurumi's pov

I walked into town and saw Shido as Shiori, hanging out with Miku. Fucking slut... I thought as I tried to about them. Walking through the small crowd and hiding away unto a shadow. I'm burning through everything... I need food... I looked for my next victim, only to pass by a group of teenage boys beating up an animal, doing the most disgusting things to it. They would barely last me a week... I thought, but still went in for the kill.

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Hello! I'm really sorry, again. I had been planning on writing a lot more but never really knew how to continue, hope you like what I did.

I was debating on whether or not to pull a "scum's wish sleepover" scene where Kurumi takes advantage of the whole "you're my best friend and I just want you happy so you may use me as you wish" or just go full horribly written angst. Guess which one I chose-

Anyways
Hope you enjoyed!
Lots of love // Ashe

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