Living With The Scars

first day

Life is not all about hurdles, its about the process of encountering , coping and then the best part conquering. there is no fun at the end goal , the fun resides in the process of reaching that goal, the zenith is the day you reach the goal. Feeling of conquering is the most addictive drug ever. That is what makes you keep coming back for more challenges and gives you the motivation to do it all.

This was one of the last things my mom said to me and i always remember it when i am starting something new or feeling nervous about anything. I repeated this to myself today more than five times because i was too nervous, no terrified of what the day ahead entailed. It was my first day at a new school. First day brings a lot of attention which would have been slightly unnerving before but now was plain ass scary. I don't know how i was going to deal with all the attention. I was afraid that everyone will take a look at me and know all my secrets. 

By the time i got ready i had worked myself into a state of nerves.

" Hey maira, are you ready? I thought i was the lazy one."

"You are sam and i am glad you know it."

"What happened? That was a really mild one, i gave you such a huge opportunity and this is how you waste it."

" My mind is on a more worthy thought process."

"Hahaha so funny now hurry up or we will late and then dad will blame me."

" Look who is worried. You go ahead, i will be right there."

" Ok then i am going. Hurry up."

Time to go, no more procrastination. All my boys were sitting on the dinning table and i had to stop and stare at the people who were my whole world. Just looking at them all made half of my nerves vanish.

"Morning guys. What, you guys started without me."

"You are late and we were hungry." Sam said in a very casual way but everyone could see that he was gloating because he woke up early.

" Have your day idiot, like every dog." Vi and dad started laughing.

"I bite too. Want me to show to you."

"Ok guys enough hurry up and eat. i will drop you guys before going to college. From tomorrow you can drive yourself." Vi hurriedly interrupted so that we don't get into a fighting match.

"I will just have juice. I don't want anything solid."
"No, maira. Not possible. You have to eat medicine and you can't do that on empty stomach. So hurry up and eat."
"Ok but i will just have toast dad please. I am too nervous to eat."
"Don't be, if you feel you can't take it. Call me and I will pick you up. No pressure at all. Understand." Vi sid and gave me a side hug.
awwwww my best brother.
" I can literally hear you awwwwwing in your mind. shut up." sam said teasingly

"huh jealous much."

"Please, this guy does not believe in petty emotions like that."
"You know such a guy is called a robot."
Vi sighed, "can we continue this in the car. I don't have all day."
"Naah I don't wanna waste my time."
We all left, after saying bye to our dad.
Vi went to the car and checked the sound system, we did not want to have the same problem again.
"Ok, all set. Let's go."
We packed ourselves in the car and the whole ride to the school was silent. My nerves were back and I was trying to be less obvious about it. I did not want to worry vi and sam, more than they already were.
Vi stopped the car at the parking lot of the school and turned to me and sam.
"Both of you have fun and take care of each other. Sam check on her during break and maira have your lunch and medicines on time. If you have any problem, do not hesitate for a second to tell sam. Okay."
"Yes boss." "Calm down vi."
Me and Sam Said together. Obviously the latter was me. This guy just worried too much.
We left the car and waved him bye but he didn't leave until we reached the building.
"sam, you have to tell me if something is wrong. does not matter how little. clear." sam held my shoulder and made me look at him while saying this.

"you don't have to tell me that. i am gonna annoy you if i so much as sneeze. do you get it?"sam laughs.

" can't wait." damn do i have the best brothers or what. thank you so much mom for them.

"now let's go or we will be very late."