Ananya Prasad
Saying that I am shocked to see Sharanya coming to my room is an understatement. Will she scold me for attending the ceremony? She should know that I don't have a choice. Had I not attended the function, our mom would have eaten me alive. She knows that. She can't scold me for something that I cannot control. Maybe I should skip attending the wedding. Yeah. I will do that. I will say that I cannot get leave for her wedding. But the problem is the devil might tell her. but I think she won't mind as long as he doesn't tell my parents or his family. Should I ask him not to tell anybody? Ananya, let's not dig our own grave.
I came back from my zoning out when Sharanya cleared her throat. I closed my open mouth and asked her,
"Umm...Do you need anything Di?"
"Uh...Nothing. I noticed that you had not done any shopping for the ceremony. You were wearing last Diwali's lehenga."
I am flustered. Is she scolding me for not wearing a new lehenga for her engagement or is she angry that I wore an old lehenga? Am I even making sense?
"Umm...Uhh...Sorry Di. I did not have time to go shopping. Things were very hectic last week as a couple of colleagues went for a seminar in Bengaluru." I explained.
"Oh....", she said and is looking around my room awkwardly.
This is the first she came to my room voluntarily and stayed there for more than two minutes. This is also the first time in years that she is talking normally with me without glaring and taunting me.
"I think I owe you an apology", she told me softly.
I looked at her shockingly. Where is my sister and who is this person in front of me?
"Di...Umm....It is not necessary", I told her.
She shook her head and said, "No Anu. It is necessary. I treated you like an outsider these years. Please don't stop me. Let me finish talking", she said when she saw that I am about to interfere. I don't like confrontation. And all these kind of talk makes me awkward. I don't know what to do in this situation.
She then continued, "When we were kids, I was always jealous of how much everyone adored you. I am the social butterfly between us but I didn't understand how you were the one that was always the center of attraction. I used to think that you have no charm but I don't know why everyone would be fussing over you. I hated that. I now understand your charm. Even though I hated you all these years and treated you badly, you never badmouthed me to anyone. You never spoke back to me, never taunted me back, and never hated me. That is the difference between us. I now understand why people love you. I am sorry that I treated you like that. I am sorry that because of me we lost the beautiful bond that sisters have. I am sorry that because of me, you grew up without a big sister."
She paused and then continued.
"But when Arjun came into our lives I was happy. He gave me all the attention I want and maybe that is why I liked him. I was happy that you both didn't get along. I was proud that he chose me as his friend instead of you. I used to be happy when you both were fighting thinking that at least one person gives me all of his attention. But, then that stabbing incident happened. I hated you because of that. I was angry with Arjun that he forgave you so easily and he went on to become friends with you. He was the first person to give me attention, pampered me as a friend and he too started to ignore me. My hate for you reached new levels after this."
Both she and I are crying at this point. She wiped her tears and continued, " When he shifted back to Delhi, I became lonely and my hatred for you didn't allow me to talk with you. On top of that, my studies were not going well and this angered our parents. And when they learned that I want to become an actress, they were angry with me. You know how conservative our family is. I chose the only profession that they hate. They started comparing me to you and that also increased my hate. I had a very difficult time convincing them. And when you told them that you wanted to become a doctor, they started taunting me. Srikanth always was and is a golden child. He had perfect grades and behavior that they want for their heir. Then there was you, who had a perfect profession according to them. I was caught up between all of that and I vented my anger on you."
"My acting career didn't take off as I expected. I did so many auditions, still, I was not successful. I went into depression. I returned to Delhi because of my modeling contract and there was pressure from mom and dad. They wanted me to settle down since I don't have any work. You were not here. Every day there used to be some fight because of my career. That's when I met Arjun accidentally. It is so easy with him. I was so happy after so many years. He asked me to date him just after an hour we met. I felt that finally, someone is loving me despite my flaws. He always gave me the space I needed and he never taunted me for my career. I accept we don't spend much time together because of his work, but when I am with him, I feel so content. He asked me so many times about you. I was afraid that, if I tell him that you both were working together, he will again become friends with you and I will again become invisible. His not knowing your actual name helped me. I asked him to keep our relationship secret from everyone. Only Karthik knows about this. With him, I feel like I am the most luckiest girl in the whole world. I wanted that. I am sorry that I hurt you because of my selfishness. I know saying sorry doesn't erase all this but this is the least I can do. I am really sorry."
Sharanya and I were crying. I wiped my tears and hugged her. she too hugged me back and cried. I don't know how much time we spent like that. After some time I broke the hug and told her, "Di, I am sorry that you had to go through all of this alone. I know you were struggling with your career, but, I did not know that you were depressed. I am happy that you found Arjun. I am happy that he makes you happy."
"Before Golu, you and I were best friends Di. After he came you never played with me. I was angry at him that he stole you from me. I fought with him to get you back. I tried so many times to break your friendship that you will get back to me. But, no matter what I did, your friendship strengthened. I was envious of him that my sister always spends her time with him. After that stabbing incident, I thought instead of being enemies with him if I become his friend, then we three can be together. I stopped fighting with him so that I can spend time with you. I did not know that you liked him."
"Di, I only tolerated him because of you. What hurt me most was that you chose him than to be with me. Even now he and I are not close. We only speak work-related things. He loves you Di. He never speaks with anyone in the hospital. He just minds his work and talks with anyone only if it is necessary. That kind of person asked you to date him within an hour. Can you imagine how much he would have liked you if he did that?"
"And Di, I was angry with you that because of you, I was humiliated in front of him. He understood that we were not even on talking terms. But, now that I heard your reason, I can understand you. You don't have to feel insecure Di. I just want us to be sisters. I lost all my hope these days. I thought we will never reconcile. I was afraid that if I come to you and speak, you will not listen to me. I am glad that you came today. I don't care about anything and anyone Di, I just want my sister back. I am happy that we cleared the misunderstanding."
"I am sorry Ananya. Because of my selfishness and insecurities, you were humiliated. I promise it will never happen. I don't deserve you but, still, I will try to be a sister worthy of you. Please forgive me and let's start fresh", She told.
"Di, don't say like that. There are no apologies between family. No matter what happens you are always my sister and I love you Di for whoever you are."
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