Jean Kirstein X Reader: My new Trost

Intro

Trost (ger.) : the comfort received by a person after a loss or disappointment.

What a beautiful view. I never would have imagined that I would get the chance to go on a boat. The wind is blowing in my face and is leaves a salty taste in my mouth. I could finally feel the freedom. I can't imagine that it's already been 3 years since I lost my parents and many of my friends. It still makes me feel sick, knowing that they were crushed by titans. Life wasn't easy anyways as an eldian child in marley. Till this day, I ask myself if I could have saved my parents if I had been stronger. If I hadn't failed so badly and actually would have become and soldier for marley, who knows? Maybe I could have saved my family. Mrs Brown survived and so did Mr. Leonhardt. Maybe things could have been different, if only I was stronger, If only I could have helped my family more. But now is not the time for regret. I was one of the few survives from marley. Mrs. Braun helped me out a lot since I didn't have a place to stay or knew what to do, honestly I think nobody really knew what to do, and even if it's hard to lose loved ones, I am still thankful that I could finally live as my own person. Mrs Braun didn't seem like the person to take care of a young adult, but apparently it had something to do with her son, she told me once that she regrets not taking care of him. I think that is the reason why she helped me and that's the reason why we are on our way to the so called paradis right now, since she wants to visit her son and live close to him. I am actually very nervous to go to paradis since it still feels so off limits. It only started to feel like a real place after Eren Jäger declared Marley war. The day I lost so many friends... I started to realize that I've been so lost in thoughts I didn't even notice that there was already land ahead. I closed my eyes one more time and prepared myself for this new chapter of my life. The noise of a bird flying by took me out of my thoughts and I noticed a tear rolling down my cheeks.