I told myself I wouldn’t cry. I didn’t want to disappoint my parents more then I already had. I didn’t want to upset my fiancé Annie, and I didn’t want the other inmates to smell my fear.
I’d read every book I could find, watched every prison movie Netflix had to offer and binge watched prison documentary after prison documentary, trying to prepare myself for the moment when I would go from Luke Hemmings, up and coming musician, to Luke Hemmings inmate number 587956.
However nothing could prepare me for the sight of the large brick building where I knew I would be spending the next thirteen months, as it loomed closer and closer as we walked towards it.
It was one tear at first, then two, then a few, and then I was doubled over sobbing wretchedly in the parking lot.
“Oh sweetie.” Annie breathed.
“I-I’m going to prison!” I choked out, realization sinking in for the first time, “Oh my God I’m going to get…. You know….up the…Oh God. I’m a tall guy but I’m lean! I can’t handle a dick up the u…”
“Luke!” my Mom interrupted swatting my arm.
“I can’t go to jail!” I wailed.
“Jesus.” My Dad muttered.
“I can’t do this.” I whispered looking around wildly, “I-I can’t…I need to get out of here I I’ll…I’ll go into hiding! That’s it we’ll run away to Mexi…”
“Luke.” Annie interrupted, “You’re going to be okay. You’ll do your time, you’ll come back out, we’ll get married.”
“You’ll give us some grand babies.” Mom sniffed.
“What if I get shanked.” I whimpered, “That happens in prison.”
“Luke.” Dad muttered, “You’re being melodramatic.”
“Please don’t make me!” I cried.
Suddenly the door to the prison swung open infront of us and a woman poked her head outside.
“Can I help you?” she demanded.
Nodding, my Dad nudged me forward.
“I um…I’m su-surrendering.” I mumbled.
Her eyes widening the woman nodded slowly, “Come on in then.”
Taking a shaky breath I started forward.
“You’re not going to say goodbye to your family?” the woman asked.
“What now?” I demanded, “Can’t they come in?”
“Not unless they’ll like to suit up.” She laughed.
Horrified I turned back to my parents.
“Keep your head down and do your time.” Dad mumbled, pulling me in for a hug, “Get in, get out.”
“Thirteen months isn’t that long.” Mom said gently before kissing me on the cheek.
Taking a shaky breath, Annie lunged forward and wrapped her arms around me.
“I love you.” I whispered.
“I love you so much.” She whispered back.
“Wait for me.” I pleaded.
“You know I will.” She replied.
“Let’s go.” The woman by the door sighed.
Standing on her tiptoes Annie kissed me before stepping back.
“I’ll visit.” She promised, “Every weekend.”
“I love you.” I mumbled, “All of you.”
“Now.” The woman by the door grumbled.
Waving sadly at the people I was leaving behind, I shuffled forward through the front doors of Litchfield prison.
