Demiboy flag || Renga oneshot

Demiboy flag

Langa was scared. He wasn't satisfied with himself. Despite coming out and being supported, despite having a wonderful, energetic ball of sunshine for a boyfriend, he still felt incomplete. He knew why, but he was scared.

He knew his mom would support him, he definitely knew Reki would love him unconditionally, but oh fuck was it scary. He looked up at his wall, a rainbow flag hung to the wall, down to a picture on his desk of him and Reki on Valentine's day. They were so happy, so in love.

What if they love went away after he confessed how he felt about himself? Fearing it was stupid, Reki loved him for him, for him. 

But would he love them? Would he support them? Would he occasionally say them referring to Langa, making Langa's lips tug up in a smile that that was them? That they were not only he, but also they? That they were not only male, but there was a part of him that was nonbinary? The part of him that felt like nothing, the part of him that just felt like Langa. 

Maybe he could hope for the best, because he had to tell him. For multiple reasons. He was tired of being called a male, although a part of him was he also wanted to be called they. He also felt that he couldn't keep a secret from his boyfriend, it wasnt fair. They had agreed to tell eachother everything that was bothering them. 

And so, he was heading over to Reki's house now. The wind flying through his light blue hair, he pushed once on the groud pushing his skateboard along. The feeling of thrill he got from going fast was there, he smiled. 

He got up at Reki's door, wiping his sweaty palms on his pants before knocking. Oh, oh this was nerve wracking. It felt like ages before the bright red headed boy opened the door with a smile, "Langa!" 

He stepped back and let Langa in, sneaking in a kiss that his mother perched on the couch probably didn't see. "Don't kiss in front of me!" She blushed. No, she saw. 

Reki flushed embarrassed, waving his hands around, "Sorry, sorry! Come Langa, come." He grabbed Langa's hand, rubbing his thumb over his knuckles once before tugging him along. Langa's heart thumped in his chest, his ribs hurt from the feeling. He still loved when Reki did that, the little rub of his hand with his thumb whenever he grabbed his hand. 

He was guided into Reki's bedroom, where he flipped onto the bed. Reki laughed and did the same, just on top of Langa. "Ompf!" 

"Ack! Sorry!" Reki stumbled off of him, laughing. Langa just smiled. 

"I have to talk about something." Langa finally said. The fear rose to his chest quickly again, his throat becoming dry. He swallowed. 

"What is it?" Reki asked, turning on his side to face Langa. He smiled, oh his smile was so reassuring. Langa shaked, the words wouldn't come out. Reki's brows furrowed and his hand came up to Langa's face, rubbing his thumb over his cheek. "Must be serious, y'kay?" 

Langa nodded, pressing his head into Reki's hand. His touch was so reassuring, his touch fooled him that they'd be together forever.

No one's touch is forever, his mind reminded him. He shook the thought away, because it was different with Reki. Reki was kind, Reki loved Langa. 

He still couldn't speak, his throat was dry. He swallowed again, again. He shook his head and leaned forward, resting his head in Reki's chest. Reki hand instantly went into his hair, patting down some loose strands of hair, his fingers threading through his hair after. "What's wrong, baby?" Reki said, softly. Reki was soft. Reki was warm. He was always like that, warm and soft. Reminding him of a blanket he wrapped himself in, in front of a fireplace during a Canadian winter. 

"I don't like myself." Langa finally choked out. It wasn't entirely true, though. Reki kissed his head quickly, "Oh, no no no. Langa your," he laughed, "your perfect. Oh how perfect you are. Your everything, man." 

Reki was so nice. So so nice, never failing to say something nice about Langa. Why was Langa afraid of telling him about these feelings about his gender? Reki would probably kiss his head, laughing, saying he loved him unconditionally. Calling him "they" a few times in a sentence, getting him adjusted. He'd probably go on his computer that night when he left, looking up different gender identities and buying flags for 5 that sounded like Langa. That's what he did with the rainbow flag, the night they became official he'd looked up and down the internet for their flags. Langa smiled at Reki's Pansexual flag on his wall. 

"I don't mean.. I mean.." Langa stuttered out softly. Reki tilted his head, "Yeah?"

"I mean my gender." 

Reki's eyes widened and he smiled, "Yeah? What were you think then, man?" He asked. Langa sighed in relief, the fear once trapped up in his throat slowly leaving. "I mean.. theres a part of me.. that.. well.." 

Langa sat up on the bed, sitting cross legged. "Theres a part of me that just feels like Langa, ya know?" He asked. Reki shook his head slowly. "Like nonbinary!" 

Langa smiled, "Sorta, I guess.. I think it's called Demiboy." Reki nodded. You could see the gears in his head turning, also jotting down notes of what it was called as well. 

"So, they? Are you my lovely partner, Langa?" Reki asked, smiling. Langa smiled, they could feel tears brimming at their eyes that they held back. "I.. guess so. Sorta. He.. and they, are fine." Langa said slowly, his voice cracking a bit from trying not to cry. Reki nodded, his smile big. "Thanks for telling me! I love you, I'm glad I get to address you properly. " Reki said, putting his hand on Langa's arm. 

Langa's tears fell then, smiling his pushed his head into Reki's chest and Reki quickly hugged him. "You were so scared, weren't you?" Reki whispered, his hand rubbing through his hair soothingly. Langa nodded.

That night Langa stayed over, and a few weeks later Reki came to him excitedly with a package. Langa chuckled, his prediction came true, and now he was hanging a demiboy flag next to his rainbow one.