IF YOU WERENT HERE- Wilbur X Reader

20

* a week later*

y/n pov: 

Tommy and tubbo had been staying with us, honestly, i don't know why but Tommy says it's because it boring at his house. and tubbo says that without Tommy at the house it's lonely, so we got too extra children. 

Wilbur and i haven't talked since the hospital or should i  say i hadn't talked to him, i really couldn't face him after my mental breakdown because of my toxic ex and our heat of the moment kiss. yea. i say the heat of the moment, he doesn't have feelings for me, and i don't have feelings for him. so i just stay out of his hair and he tries to stay out of mine. the boys are staying in the two guest bedroom and i have the basement, i know the basement but no, it is finished with wood flooring and much more, it technically my room, because for some odd reason will thought it would nice for me to have the biggest room of the house. ]

simp.

"Tommy shut the fuck up!" i yell from the living room, 

"no I'm streaming," he yells back, i couldn't handle the fact he is acting like this is his house, i just. i can't, i don't mind but i feel like we are intruding on wills space so I'm trying to be conservative, i am a few thousand dollars away from buying this house in London, we currently live in Brighton but i kinda want a fresh start from everyone and everything.

"y/n please come here." will yells from upstairs, great this is gonna be the first real talk since the hospital,

i start to walk up the stairs typing on my phone to tubbo,

me: what does he want? I'm nervous.

tubbo: don't be, its probably him asking a simple question. maybe you guys should talk

me: i guess.

"yes will?" i ask walking into his room, he was just sitting at his pc typing in something, "so can we talk about. about us?" he said turning around, and laying his hands in his lap.

"oh yea, for sure." there really wasn't anything to talk about he doesn't l like me and i don't lirk him, right?

i went and sat down on the bed and put my phone on silent. 

he then did the same he walked over to the door closing it and locking, he didn't want tommys stream to hear anything.

"so?" i asked 

"so, y/n as you know i kissed you, twice," he said bluntly.

it kinda caught me off guard. "yes I'm well aware." i say with a tiny giggle.

"so, how do you feel about that?" he asked looking at his finger fighting.

"well, i think. it was the heat of the moment stuff like i know you don't like me like that," i said bluntly, and when i said it i saw his face fall from a smile to a realization face, honestly i didn't believe the words i was saying.

i didn't like him, right?

"oh, okay i just wanted to get your perspective on the situation," he said getting off his bed. and walking to his setup.

"um, you just gonna walk away? okay?" i said standing up.

"well, what else am i gonna do?" he said turning back around

"are you good? What's with the adutide."

"I'm fine," he said with the most faded expression.

"i can see your not," i said, what was wrong with him? "I'm good, y/n," he said sitting down in his chair putting his head in his hands.

"will what wron-" i try to say but i get cut off.

"I'm fine!" he yells letting me flinch a little. "what's wrong will, clearly your not fine!" i yell back, i didn't expect this to go this way.

"you know what, yea something is wrong do you want to know?!" he yells back, at this point we are just yelling at each other.

"yea, i do!" i yell again i need to stop yelling, Tommy may hear.

"how do you think it feels when i try so hard to show you affection and show you that i like you, and your just oblivious, or maybe your not oblivious maybe you just don't care. because that is just your personality, right? because our reship is important to me, but you don't see it and you don't value it, and it kinda pisses me off, because i want you, but for some reason, you don't want me. even though when i kiss you, you kiss me back so obviously there something. or do you just do it to play with my mind. It was so hard to see you in the hospital because of clay, i was 5 seconds from going to Clay's house and beating the shit out of him, but i didn't because i needed to be there with you, for you. because i love you. i love you more than anyone else. it hurts that you don't love me. and i hate it."

"yea!" i yell. 

"yea," he says yelling as well. 

i grab his shirt and pull him down to my level kissing him passionately. i felt his hands travel to my waist i let go of his shirt and threw my hands on his shoulders,

 i could feel my back hit the bed as i fall onto it without breaking the kiss, he was so sweet i could taste his chapstick. 

he let go only to breathe. i could see his eyes, "do you want to?" he asked,

 "i want you, i want you will," i say he comes down to my lips kissing me and dragging his lips to my neck leaving small bruises. 

oh my god, im falling for my best friend.

no, i fell for my best friend.