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The day quickly ended. I went straight to my room and let my body feel the soft mattress. I looked at the ceiling, making myself take a deep breath.
"Why did I choose this field again?". I asked myself while still looking at the ceiling.
"Did you pick this field because you want to prove something? To prove that you're fine without them? To prove that you can do anything without their help?". I started to question myself.
"Are you really that desperate to prove yourself to them? Do you really want their attention? To those people who don't care about you?". I close my eyes and let out carbon dioxide and inhale oxygen.
I maintain myself doing that routine to calm myself from breaking down. I got up and went to shower to relax my mind. After that I pulled out my books and started reading lessons for tomorrow, advance reading.
I flinched when someone knocked on my door. I got irritated and opened the door, seeing my brother.
"What?". I opened the door bigger and got back to my desk.
"Your professor reported you for humiliating him in front of the class". I rolled my eyes, how many times did I rolled my eyes today?
"I didn't". I simply replied.
"Yes, you did!-"
"I said I didn't! What is wrong with you?! You're on their side! Always! You always look at me as if I'm the one who causes everything bad!". I can't stop myself, I throw all the books on my desk to the floor.
"I didn't humiliate him, I just simply asked him if he can cut off calling me as your younger sister! I have a name and I don't want to be involved in your life same with my life. Is that a hard thing to do?!". I left my room and went downstairs, seeing my step sister, Izzy.
"Unnie, where are you going?-". I passed her by and just walked away from the house. I don't know what she's doing here.
All I want is to get away from that house. Away from all the people that caused me a lot of traumas and made me suffer from all the things I didn't do.
I didn't notice that my feet dragged me to this place. Cemetery, the place where my favorite person is located.
"Mom...". I cleared my throat to stop from crying. I walked towards her place.
"Why did you leave me? You should take me with you-". I sat down on the grass and looked down to her gravestone, touching her name engraved on it.
"Why?...". There's so many questions in my head that I think will never be answered.
"Why did you let me live with those people? I'm tired...". I leaned to the gravestone and began to weep.
