They think I'm all smiles,
That I never have these thoughts.
I have to happy for them.
Someone has to be the sunny girl.
Even if I'm screaming for help,
Even if I get those thoughts in my head,
All I do is wait.
Wait until I get home,
And take care of it on my own.
It barely helps.
But opening up hurts twice as much.
Even if I did open up to them.
They'd just say stop pretending.
What if I'm not pretending?
Why don't they believe me?
I shouldn't have faked.
I shouldn't have been the sunny girl.
My chances are gone.
The tears have left.
My mind is set.
My decision is made.
And I'm ready.
I'm not who they think I am.
