I'll Be Loving You

Chapter 5: Memories

 "Fucking hell he's going to drop. His alpha needs to bring him back."

"He doesn't have one."

"What do you mean he doesn't have one?"

"Does it look like there's a panicking person nearby?"

"Shit okay, get Harry."

Louis couldn't tell whose voices were floating through the limbo wrapping its arms around him. Everything was blurred into the deafening sound of his heartbeat and the pulsing feeling of his heart tearing through the cages in his body. His breath was caught in his lungs and his mind was caught in the past.

"Is that okay there?" He'd taken a step back to admire the Christmas decorations he'd been in charge of. Nick didn't look up from his phone.

An exasperated sigh. Nothing.

An extra-exasperated sigh.

Nick rolled his eyes and finally met Louis' pout. "What the fuck do you want?"

He'd huffed and gestured at the intricately hung white lights flickering so they cast pup-shaped shadows across the floors. It had taken him approximately twelve consecutive hours, several sets of ladders, and mild vertigo to get them draped across the whole building. "You ordered me to do this, but you're not looking at it."

"I don't give a shit about fairy lights and pretty shadows. It's just tradition for you to do it." He'd gone back to his phone, scrolling through whatever was more important than his boyfriend.

Louis had ignored the painfully familiar feeling crawling up his skin and simply vowed to do better. Just a little bit more to get noticed. For Nick to maybe smile and say just how gorgeous everything looked. For him to maybe stop ignoring Louis for days on end and leaving him to crawl into a cold bed.

Just a little bit better.

Arms closed around him as someone worked to bring him back from the brink.

"Breathe. You're here. You're safe." The words were slow, melodic, forcefully calm. Someone was tumbling towards the edge of panic but staying in control long enough to be exactly what Louis needed.

A sweet smell overtook his senses. He could make out someone scenting him, arms holding him as they nosed along his neck. It filled him with a warm sense of calm, so strong he almost wanted to curl up into a ball and go to sleep.

Whoever was scenting him must have realized this, because they reluctantly pulled away and straightened up. Still, they kept their arms around him. "Louis, can you hear me?"

Louis blinked a couple of times until his vision came into focus. Standing there was Harry, concern etched into every feature on his face. Louis felt a dark blush splatter his cheeks as he realized what he was doing, but it quickly turned to dread as he realized why.

He was standing in the middle of the school parking lot, dozens of people trying to see what was happening and half his pack looking ready to fight somebody. Curious groups of teenagers were on their tip-toes, all whispering and speculating amongst each other. It was all a little too much at once as he tried to steady his breathing. The suffocating feeling was inching its way back, everyone's eyes closing on a moment he wished he could be alone for.

Harry placed a hand on the nape of his neck, silently willing him to calm down. But there was that sickeningly bitter smell again, making it difficult for Louis to breathe. He didn't want it lingering in his nose or pushing at the back of his throat.