I'll Be Loving You

Chapter 4: Young

   Louis had been kicking himself for the past.. however-many minutes he's been shoving his face into his pillow. Well, to be exact, he had wallowed in self-pity for half the time and angrily spun into a self-deprecating rant for the rest. Harry was still outside, but he had stopped the incessant knocking when he accepted it wasn't going to accomplish anything. He disappeared for about thirty seconds, presumably to get clothes, but had returned shortly thereafter. Now he was simply on the other side of the door, probably waiting for the inevitable moment it would finally open.

Louis ran a hand through his hair in a mix of panic and frustration. He had promised, promised that he wouldn't screw up this time. At the time it had seemed unnecessary-- how many times did one get involved with a pack Alpha? But now it was a glaring weight pressing hard against the soft spot in between his shoulder blades.

His mind whirled as he thought of ways to fix things. He had already made it too awkward, so he couldn't exactly go outside and ask Harry to just forget everything he had done... the nuzzling, the licking, god. Louis' cheeks flared in embarrassment just thinking about it.

Oh wait. He didn't have to ask Harry's permission to act like it never happened. He could simply pretend.

If you act hard enough and tell a lie enough times, you start to believe it yourself. If Louis brushed off the last hour like it had been as insignificant as he wished it had been, as if he really didn't remember it at all, maybe Harry would do the same. No, he would have to do the same, because there was no way Louis was going to survive otherwise.

He finally stepped out from under the covers and pulled on his uniform. It was still about an hour until he had to be at school, but he figured it wouldn't exactly help his case to open his door naked. He ran a comb through his hair, fixed the strays, and made sure his bag was packed for school.

It took Louis several moments to compose himself enough so that a) he could carry out the necessary performance, and b) Harry wouldn't be able to smell the guilt and humiliation fusing itself into the blood in his veins. He took a few deep breaths, focused his thoughts on boxes of Cocoa Puffs, steadied his hands against his pants, and pulled the door open.

Harry had been lightly leaning against it, so he stumbled back a little before regaining his balance.

Louis waited until Harry was looking at him before working an easy smile onto his face. He knew it was believable by the confusion etched onto the Alpha's face. Soft green eyes drifted to the backpack straps Louis was holding onto, probably unaware that he was making a conscious effort not to desperately clutch them, and back to the blue eyes.

"I'm just going to stop by some coffee before going to school. I hope you don't mind that I'm kind of skipping the rest of training. I'm walking though, so I guess it sorta makes up for the whole building endurance thing?" Louis let out a laugh, surprising even himself by how casual he sounded.

Harry simply blinked at him, at a loss for words.

The seconds dragged forward, Louis' trepidation weaving itself more tightly into the air he was trying to force down his lungs. "Uh okay, well I'm going to go now."

He'd only gotten a few steps forward when Harry's hand closed around his wrist. It was a soft, hesitant touch, but he may as well have kissed Louis' wrist. The poor boy was trying not to hyperventilate from the sudden warmth under Harry's hands. "Louis...are we not going to talk about what happened?"

Louis froze for a split second, but he gathered himself quickly enough to smoothly turn around. He eased a lopsided grin onto his face and cocked his head to the side. He knew he could go for total denial, but that would be too obvious. No, he had to go the other route. "The thing from training? Sorry if that made you uncomfortable or anything. It wasn't a big deal, really," he said, pushing as much conviction as possible into the lie.