Fated to say, "Goodbye"

ch VIII

I don't quite know what is going on here...

And, this chapter is unedited. So, sorry for any stupid errors coming ahead.

- Wan

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Feeling miserable was not only for Gulf but Mew too.

On one end, Gulf was crying himself to sleep. He lost his last bit of appetite. He either felt numb or depressed. Well, is there a remarkable difference between the two? I don't think so Gulf only left his room to have food, which he was forced to. He wanted to do nothing but, just, lie down in his cold bed and let everything pass by. He did not want to be a part of any activities.

He felt his insides growing cold. His surroundings, to him, were all blurry and the sounds were just irritating noises eating his head. He felt himself falling into an endless pit of darkness. He no more had his light to guide him around.

His sunshine... it was gone. There was nothing other than darkness and coldness left for him to embrace.

 His Mew? 

.

.

.

Gone.

Gulf was growing dead. He no more wished to see another sunrise. Because he did not have his boyfriend to wish him a good morning even over a call. He did not want to go to school because he knew his love was avoiding him. And this ignorance was killing him. He had no motivation left.

And, Mew Astor was not in a very peaceful state of mind either. He had been in love with Gulf for a longer time. He loved the man even before they became friends. From even before when Gulf knew he exists. But he still carried on loving Gulf secretly until the sweet little confession they had at the top of the giant wheel in the amusement park. His happiest moment in the past three years of loving Gulf. Gulf said it to his face that he liked him too. Gulf opened the doors to his heart for Mew who was eagerly waiting for this to happen for years. Though in his fantasies. He was the happiest man on Earth.
Gulf trusted him so much. With his thoughts and even body, when Gulf was still in his arms. But.. it all came to an end. In the way least desired by Mew. I should have sensed the danger when he came to stay! Mew would scold himself. He felt stupid for not questioning why would Gulf suddenly come to stay with him. He should have known better that Gulf would never get to stay with him for a whole week in normal circumstances.

But when Gulf told him, "I was engaged to the son of my mother's friend when I was just six. And now, my father wants the marriage to happen. Mew, babe, I'm sorry." The way Gulf told him that they were basically spending their last week together. And how their relationship would go null and they could no more be together, it felt as if he was thrown a bucket of ice at. That was when he lost it.

That was when he broke worse than how he had ever imagined he could. All the pieces of his heart were shattered into dust. He ran away to his best friend's house to sleep that night, hoping that it was just a terrible nightmare. That when he wakes up his boyfriend would greet him with the sweetest smile in the world. That all the words he had heard in Gulf's sweet voice that night, were just the demon whispering in his head to mess with him and not the reality. But... It was all real.
He had cried the moment he opened his eyes and found himself still in his best friend's place, without his baby. He cried all the time. But never let anybody see a single tear on his face. He wailed into the pillow under his head. Still wishing all of this to be unreal. A dream. A bad one. The most terrible. But every time he opened his eyes, he found himself all alone. His Gulf nowhere near him.
He rushed back to his own apartment, hoping Gulf had not taken his words seriously and was still there, waiting for him. But what he met with was an empty place. He rushed to the couch to find his baby where he had left him. What he met with was- the bowl of popcorn still on the table, the cushions still all over the place. And the most heartbreaking thing was the etching Gulf's tears had left on the floor.