Letters In My Drawer [Completed]

Letter #9

Dear Cal,

You never fail to make me feel better huh. Talking to you calms my soul. Literally. You know those pills that people consume to control their emotions? Yeah, you are my pill. It doesn't even matter if you couldn't provide a solution to my problems. Just seeing your attempts to make me smile really lightens my heart. That's what friends are for, right? (-:

You had a theory though. That Tinsley was insecure. And here I am, rolling my eyes when you said that. Excuses, excuses, excuses, I thought. But you went on, "Did it ever cross your mind that maybe, all of this isn't because of the smoothie? Sure, that incident might have started her distaste for you, but things aren't always that simple ri.  I mean look at you, I can sense your confidence from around the globe and your friends sound amazing from the stories you shared. Have you thought that Tinsley might be jealous of you?"

Oh that earned you another eye roll from me alright. What you typed was plain ridiculous. "Newsflash, she's the one with the confidence that girls dream of and boys worship. Not me. Did I even mention the followers she has? Her clique practically follows..."

"Are your friends your followers?", you interrupted me, and the answer to that was pretty obvious - never. I can never imagine them being anyone's follower. Nessa has a big heart; Connor's pretty smart; Ash - a total blondie but has a loud personality; James the goof ball and me with a bit of a temper. In a way, we complement each other and I can't imagine them losing their individual sparkle. "Can't you see Tinsley's insecure? She's jealous of you and the close-knitted friends you have. With the whole ex bf liking you thing? Trust me, that didn't help."

I would like to thank you for that, Cal. It made naive little Riley realise that things aren't always what they appear to be. "We all have our insecurities", you said. "Be it our body, or the way we dance. Just because Tinsley gave off the 'perfect' vibe, it doesn't mean that she isn't struggling with herself every single night."

You said that with such a conviction, it makes me wonder.

Have you been through these struggles?

Ri, who loves you dearly.