New Beginnings

Everyone makes mistakes

Andy's POV

After the show, I sat and in my hotel room. Juliet and Maria went to get some food. I thought about Scout and how I watched her take her final breaths. I felt tears form in my eyes as all the memories from our relationship had come back. "She left me so I wouldn't have to take care of Maria. Why would she do that? I love my little girl to death and she thought I wouldn't wanna take care of her" I questioned to myself. I thought more and more. The more I thought the more I cried. "Scout, why did you really leave me? Was it because I was always busy? Did you really love me" I questioned as if talking to her. I looked through all of our old texts I had screen shoted and saved. I got angry. I don't know why but I did. "You said you would never leave me" I said raising my voice a little bit. "WHY DOES GOD HAVE TO TAKE EVERYTHING GOOD AWAY" I shouted. I threw my phone against the wall. I passed back and forth. "Why did she have to die? I always wanted her back. I knew there was something that she wasn't telling me when we were texting. Ugh, she meant way to much to me" I said. I heard Juliet come in but I didn't care. I passed back and forth, crying till I sunk to the ground. I cried in the corner in the bathroom so Juliet wouldn't find me. I heard a knock on the bathroom door. "Honey are you okay" Juliet asked. "Yeah I'm fine. I'll be right out" I said trying not to let her know I was crying. I looked through the drawers and at last I found it. The blade I keep incase of emergency. I haven't used it in two years. I hesitated for a moment. Thinking weather if it's worth it. I have been clean for two years. That thought was quickly pushed from my mind and I drug the blade across my skin. It felt good to actually feel the pain again. I heard someone open the door. I sank to the floor in tears again. I felt Maria's arms wrap around me. I felt her tears on my shoulder. I hugged her and she looked at my arms. "You know mommy used to do this. She said that she didn't want to but a bully made her" she said with tear filled eyes. I looked shocked for a split second. "Mama used to do this" I asked. Maria nodded her head and she dressed my wounds. She kissed my cheek and said, "Promise me you will never do this again." I promised, dried my eyes and walked out of the bathroom. I hugged Juliet and she knew not to ask. I kissed her and she smiled at me. "Feeling better" she asked. I nodded and sat down to eat. I heard the guys come in. "Sup guys" I said. "Sup man" CC said I'm his normal hyper as fuck state of mind. I smiled at this. I had an amazing girlfriend, and amazing daughter and great friends. I can't let the pain take over again. I just cant.