I. Hate. This. Place.
Out of all the schools in Mew Mexico I could have transferred to, I got stuck at the worst one.
I get made fun of EVERY DAY. Everyone HATES me.
I get made fun of for wearing designer clothes.
I get made fun of for getting good grades.
I get made fun of for needing glasses.
I get made fun of for my job.
I get made fun of for my word choice.
So I tried to get some roots in the school.
I joined all the clubs to meet people and get called an over achiever.
I tried to get the teachers to like me and get called a teacher's pet.
I tried to impress people and get called a show off.
I CAN'T DO A DAMN THING RIGHT!!!!
***
After a while of trying, I changed my tactics.
I shut everyone out.
I convinced all my teachers to give me independent projects. All I had to say was "We are a year ahead in Virgina. I've already learned this stuff." And I didn't have to go to class. I had my own room to do individualised assignments.
I found a spot on the recess field that you can't see from anywhere else. Every day at recess I would hide there and read the Hunger Games series. Other people think they are Hunger Games fans? It is ALL I have to look forward to everyday. Katniss is my only real friend. Those books kept me alive.
When I finished Mocking Jay I cried for hours.
***
I found ways like this to avoid everyone. But the bullying got worse.
Don't get me wrong. I never got hit or anything. But the people who talk about me have a way of getting to me. Like they'd say something just loud enough so I would hear it. There was whispering everywhere. I could never escape their eyes Judging me. Even the people I consider to be friends "kid around with me". I could understand that once or twice, but when you're calling me a loser every day it's hard to believe it's a joke.
Do they not see?!?! Can they not tell that they are slowly making my life impossible to live???
Again don't get me wrong, I never consider suicide, but that's only for my families sake.
It doesn't matter though because I'm already dead on the inside.
