Love Missed

Chapter 2

It was a multiple vehicle collision as I was told. Shi De decided to apparently fetch me from my house when a drunk driver rear ended 2 other vehicles before it hit Gao Shi's car. There we're already two fatalities while a few more are in critical condition including Shi De.

"What if Gao Shi De..?" I shook my head. I refused to think the worst. I don't know what will become of me if that...that happens. Perhaps, I was able to still live without ShiDe in those 5 years of him being in America but if he dies, just the thought of him being gone is already enough  kill me.

I don't know how I managed to, but somehow I was able to make it to the hospital. Due to the number of victims, the utter chaos I arrived in at the emergency room just added to the worry that I am already feeling. The fear that I was feeling subsided a little when Shi De's tearful mom greeted me with a worried yet assuringly warm embrace.

"How is he, ma?" The word "ma" naturally rolled out of my tongue. It was what I used to call her when Shi De and I were still dating.

Just then a nurse came out from one of the emergency room only to come back not to long after with packs of blood.

Scenario after scenario kept playing in my head as we waited and waited. I feel like my body's jist moving out of reflex but my mind's been numb for hours. The only thought I have is that of  Shi De.

Finally after what seems lile eternity, a doctor csme out of the emergency room.

"Mr. Gao Shi De's family?" Immediately, both mom and I stood up.

"How's my son?"

"He's out of danger for now. He's lost a lot of blood but we managed to stabilize him so we can move him to a room. The ext 24 hours will be critical so we'll still need to observe him.

Relief flooded my body as I hear the words of the doctor. It's not the best news with Shi De still being in the brink of danger but I'll accet that over hearing that he's left me forever.

After making the necessary arrangement, Shi De was finally moved to a VIP room and I haven't left his side since then.

"Shu Yi, you should eat first." A hand placed on my shoulder startled,  Shi De's mom worriedly standing by me, her presence alone was already a comfort in itsef.
Not bothering to release Shi De's hands that's been interwined with mine, I shook at head at her. "I'm not hungry."

"You know Shi De won't really be happy if he wakes up and finds out that your stomach gave you a problem again.

It's all she needed to say before I accepted the food she was offering me but immediately scrunched up my nose when I saw vegetables in it.

"Shi De told me to make sure you always get you dse of veggies." Despite the tiredness in her eyes, he still gave me a fond like. I didn't have the heart to refuse.

In no time, I finished the food on my platw and went back to holding Shi De's hands.

"Shu Yi, I'm sorry."  Shi De's mama started. Giving her a questioning look, she contiued. "It was because of me that Shi De indeed up neglecting you."

"Ma, what are you saying?"

"Shi De already booked a return flight to TW even while we're still on the flight going to the US. But I was really careless,I didn't even know I was already pregnant that I went straight to the hospital when we arrived there."

I didn't know what to say after knowing this fact. As Shi De's mom continued, I only felt worst. There I was drowning in misery, hating on Shi De when all this time,he had to go through all this hardships by himself in a foreign land.

I simply hugged Shi De's mom,both of us giving comfort and strength in each other's arm with no further words. The love we both have for Shi De solidified our mother-son relationship 5 years ago and it hasn't changed a bit even 5 years later.

"Shi De and I really have a lot of catching up to do." I whispered, regret washing over me as I thought of how I treated Shi De.

"You'll have all the time to make up for it. You both will be together until you're both old and gray."

"I love him so much." I can't help the tears as I said those words aloud.

I love him with all my being. From my mind to my heart and soul,it's all Shi De's. A life without him is.. something I can't really imagine. These 5 years, I lived simply because I was breathing. But if I loose him again, that will also the end of Zhou Shu Yi.

Just then, the heart monitoring machine started beating erratically and seconds later Shi De body started convulsing.

"Shi De!" I felt myself panicking as my grip in his hands tightened.

Nurses and a doctor was immediately in the room to attend to Shi De's as me and Shi De's mama stepped aside to let them save Shi De.

My focus was on Shi De, everything else, every one else, every single person around me seems to be moving in a blur.

"Clear!" I hear the doctor before the pressing the defibrilator's to Shi De's body, sending electric shock

I heard the doctor say the same thing  a few more times before I heard what I dreaded to hear the most.

"No!" I pushed my body away from Shi De's mom and run towards Shi De's. "Gao Shi De, I won't accep this. I won't accept this. Get up you bastard!"

"Shu Yi" I felt Shi De's mama behind me, her controlled sob making my cry harder as tears after tears escape my eyes.

"You already left me for 5 years, you can't leave agan. Shi De, I can't do this again. Shi De, you need to wake up. Wake up, Shi De. Please wake up."