Disguised

Who am I?

All I know is that there are many things in this world that show who we are. No, I am not talking about "buying" who you are. For, material things do not count as that booming character you portray.

Nor, does seeing yourself as who you are not. I guess what I am trying to say is the world is an immense place, it is too big to travel in a day, week or let alone a couple of months. So trying to figure out this vast place may never come to terms and I guess I will have to live with that.

Seeing something much smaller though, can be just as grueling. Sure it does not take many deep blue seas to cross and everlasting tress to plow through. Nothing is entirely easy but I think it would be reassuring to know that we could at least know who we are at some point.

Walking down those overcrowded halls and plowing through my unknown peers I started to feel that same feeling.
I felt alone.

Not just that exaggerating aloneness that many self involved teenage girls feel when they lose their most treasured boyfriend, but indeed a much bigger emotion that engulfed over myself.

Step by step my feet lead the way, my eyes glued to the floor tiles. My books pressed to my chest blocking myself from the ignorance of the people around me. I never really have been into opening up to people that is probably why the closest friends I have are my earphones. I guess sometimes it is easier to block people out because they end up being a lying disappointment.

"Go make friends open up that locked door. Live life with others," my mom always told me.

I am living life I always thought, just maybe not the way she viewes "life" Still walking down those halls it felt just like any normal day until I came into direct contact with the floor. I collided into some moron who obviously wasn't paying attention. I have no clue what was worst, the humiliation of me falling flat on my face or the fact that my papers whirled in all the directions of the world.

Surprisingly the person actually was giving me a helping hand and mumbled "Sorry" in a very distinct voice.

Quickly shocked by his voice and out coming sound he coughed and said "Sorry" again. Except this time he attempted to speak in an American accent.

"Wow, are you Australian?" I said in response to his sorry.

He looked at me and didn't say anything just made direct eye contact with me. I never had a guy look at me that long before and his ocean blue eyes made me really insecure. I broke the starring game going on between us and looked toward the scattered papers on the ground.
"Sorry, thats not my business. I mean, its not personal but I um...."

"Its okay, Don't worry about it." He had a unbelievable smile.

When he smiled his glasses rose up against his squinted eyes. His hair was light chocolate and I could see his original blond roots, I knew it had obviously been dyed. He dressed nicely, he wore a plaid blue shirt that brought out the color of his eyes. He wore long plaid pants and seemed to really dress to impress. He had the classic big nerd glasses but they seemed to work on him.

"My names Kate. I have't seen you here before." I responded extending my pale hand to towards his long bony fingers.

He grabbed my arm and pulled it in moving my arm. My arm was a sea saw moving up and down and up and down.
"My name is Daniel, I just moved here." His voice was then again was nothing but fake.

I never really thought much of the mysterious person standing in front of me. I never bothered to see past what my eyes were not showing me.