THIN ICE |BOOK I |BWWM|

•ᴘʀᴏʟᴏɢᴜᴇ•

!Content/ Trigger Warning!

•PRINCETON, NEW JERSEY•

Tomorrow I'll make cookies.

I have to call Olivia.

What's the name of that song from the Toyota commercial?

I should get a new toothbrush.

Thoughts whipped around my aching head, darting from one side to the other trying to keep my mind occupied and away from the searing pain in my abdomen. Reluctantly, my strained pupils refocused on the dark-haired, grey-eyed man violently shoving himself into me while hungrily ravaging the tender skin on my neck and chest.

My wrists were crossed roughly above my head like usual and held by my husband's fierce grip. They had gone numb about five minutes ago and I couldn't think of anything long enough to ignore both pains. As if answering my pleas, he released my wrists and transferred his hands to my throat, squeezing just enough to make it difficult to breathe. Reflexively, my palms pushed into his toned abs, only to have his grip tighten.

"I'm not done." A low and wicked growl passed through his clenched teeth.

I choked back tears threatening to spill over for what felt like an eternity before I heard him groan and push himself off of me. My legs lay sprawled out over our sheets, throbbing as my battered body slowly developed a gentle shiver. I weakly rolled on my side as the mattress shifted under me and my ears caught the brief hiss of a zipper.

"Go clean yourself up." He delicately pressed his supple lips to my cheek.

My toes curled and my back stiffened as I feebly rose to my feet and shuffled to the bathroom. I quickly closed the door behind me, nearly catching my fingers, and I sat on the edge of our granite tub cradling my distended belly.

Absentmindedly, I turned the faucet as the headache built from holding my tears back finally reached its peak. The floodgates of my mind opened only to release nothing.

Two years. It has only been two years since our wedding and I had already run out of tears to cry. I held my head, desperate for something. A miracle, maybe. Or even for this pain at the base of my thighs to go away. Soft sobs escaped my quivering lips as I finally felt a weight on my eyelashes and a pitter-patter on my knee.

If only my tears could solve it. Then I wouldn't be so afraid for the night to come or to hear the word, which was so callously used to describe this place- 'home'.

If only my tears could solve it—then I wouldn't be pregnant and married to a slick-tongued monster.

If only—

A blunt knock on the door snatched me from my thoughts.

"Y—yes?" I cleared my throat, quickly turning off the faucet.

"Tell Bianca to bring you some ice. I gotta handle something."

"Okay," I mumbled.

If only.

I soaked in the lukewarm water for about 15 minutes before I received a sharp kick to my belly. I gave myself a quick wash, wrapped my body in my thick pink robe, and returned to the disheveled bed.

I pulled the black sheets to the floor and kicked them to the side. No doubt those needed to be washed, and I'd rather be cold than lay in them. As I lay on the bare mattress with my knees gently tucked into my belly, another swift knock sounded throughout the room.

"Come in," I answered, bracing for round two.

"Stai bene Jules?" The tender voice belonging to my brother-in-law, Andres, asked.

I lay quietly, the rims of my eyelids welling up again.

Andres opened the door and peeked around. His eyes glossed over the room, to the sheets, then to me. He calmly paced to my side, while holding two ice packs and knelt down to meet my gaze, sliding the ice packs to me.

"Bianca was busy."

I gave a pitiful smile and sandwiched them between my thighs.

"Are you leaking?" He asked as he pursed his lips and gingerly pushed a piece of hair out of my face.

I shook my head no.

"I'm so sorry Julia. You deserve better." Andres sighed.

Again a heavy stream of tears flowed from my eyes to the mattress under my head. Andres wiped them away with the pad of his thumb and lifted me up, pulling me to his warm chest.

A comforting hush blanketed us for a while as I allowed the rhythmic drum of Andres's heart to lull me to sleep. My mind was on the edge of a REM cycle when Andres broke the silence.

"I thought about what you asked of me."

My hopeful eyes drifted upward to meet his sincere stare.

"I'll do it, I'll help you leave."

A/N: Thank you for reading my lovelies! See ya soon. :D