Help Is Only So Far Away

Part 24

Quirrell did not know what he expected when walking into the apartment. Seeing Tyler through Voldemort's doorway, rubbing his back, was definitely not it though. He couldn't see much, but he could see Tyler's slouched shoulders and the sad eyes under the hanging wall of curly brown hair.

He quietly walked towards the door, scared to make too loud a noise, in case he upset the image before him.

Tyler looked up at him and his eyes became unreadable as he looked his friend up and down.

"Did she leave?" he mouthed across to him and Quirrell ashamedly nodded. Tyler patted Voldemort's back one last time before heaving himself up to his feet.

"I am going to go out for a nice long walk. You two, stay here and talk. No destroying anything." He announced loudly to the room, a teasing tone contrasting the slight grimace on his face. He patted Quirrell comfortingly on the shoulder, in a clear statement of 'you got this' that the wizard himself could not feel.

A few seconds later and the front door shut again, leaving the two alone.

Voldemort, slowly and cautiously lifted his head, squinting at Quirrell in the doorway. He grunted and lay his head down sideways on his arms. Quirrell took that as permission to enter and gingerly sat himself on the bed. The two stewed in an awkward silence, each unsure what to say but absolutely sure everything was their fault and they had to be the one to talk.

The possible things to say whirled through Quirrell's head, each sounding more daft than the last. His fingers fidgeted with the hem of the dark blue shirt - which had become untucked whilst dancing earlier - out of nervousness. He just had to pull himself together and tell him. Tell him that he loved him. He could do that, right?! It wasn't hard. People did it everyday. People weren't him, but they did it every day. He just had to stop being the scared little-

"m srrm."

Quirrell blinked. Okay, so he didn't understand a word of that but Voldemort spoke. It shocked him out of the cycle his thoughts were going into.

"I'm s-sorry, what did y-you say?"

Voldemort lifted his head so that it was just his chin resting on his arms as he resolutely looked out the dreary window instead of at his friend beside him.

"I said, I'm sorry."

Okay. That was not what Quirrell expected at all. It's fine though, he could make this work maybe. He just had to say someth-

"I ruined your date with Sarah. I'm sorry." Voldemort sighed and Quirrell thought he could see some tension in his shoulders ease, but it was hard to tell when only facing his reclined back.

"You....you didn't r-ruin my....date with S-Sarah." I ruined it by having it in the first place. Why did I think asking her out was a good idea?

"Quirrell....please can I just talk? Afterwards, you can say anything you want, ask anything, do anything, kick me out if you want, but can I just talk?"

Quirrell had never heard him sound so grave and immediately nodded. Voldemort didn't see it, but took the silence as confirmation to talk. He slowly sat himself up and turned to face the other man, crossing his legs under him. When the younger wizard's eyes met his friend's face, he immediately stifled a squeak of shock at the visible tear tracks and sunken eyes.

"I.....I didn't mean to ruin your date with Sarah. I know it may have seemed like it because I wasn't very nice to her. I just......don't like her."

"I-"

The older wizard shook his head.

"No, wait, that's not what I meant at all. I......she's nice. Disgustingly nice. The kind that I used to be unable to stand but now.....well now, she's just nice. But, it's not that......She just drives me insane. She makes me so angry and it takes everything in me not to curse her....but I don't because I know she matters to you and I don't want to hurt or upset you. Do you understand that? I didn't hurt her because I know it would make you sad. I've never cared about anyone else's feelings like that before. I've always just done things because I wanted to do them, never taking into account anyone else's opinions."